soul survivor
2008-12-22 04:32:05 (UTC)

ive choosen!

The ship has sailed betwee me and cameron! I just gave up! I'm with steven now and cameron is dating again and I'm happy for him. Me and cam still talk now and then and were good still were still like family u know. The other day I had an emphipany!and it was weird . I told cam about it cause there are things that I can talk to him about that I can't with steven. its not that I don't trust steven its just that cam knows me well enuff to know how I am and was suprised and wished that I was like this 2 years ago I said I was like this 6 years ago. I talk to cam about money and how I'm looking for a new job and I need more money and that I can't do it if I wanna settle wit someone. Maybe that someone is steven. Steven is talking about shacking me up and marrying me. Like seriously he always tells me I'm gonna make u my wifey. It scares me cause when u think about being with someone and u have expectations it just gets broken. Soooo I'm just not gonna say anything I'm just ignoring the whole issue. It just would tear me apart if I'm ready to talk down the ile wit someone. I'm even scared to shack up with steven.I'm just going with the flow just cause I can't handle going through heart ache again . Then ill be going through the waves of ICE QUEEN! Not like I've been told it b4.