Jack's Twisted Kingdom
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2008-10-10 05:09:25 (UTC)

your imput? fuck off

seriously. everyones got an opinon on what I should, or
shouldn't do, what's realistic and whats not. it's my life,
and I'm not acting like a petulant child because I want to
do what I want..

still sorting things out with my mom's stuff, and I still
haven't heard about the house yet, but I'm getting anxious,
I really hate being right, but I get the feeling I'm going
to get fucked out of having it. and I'm not sure quite how
I'll react. which pisses me off, and makes an already
tenuous situation just that much more, deleterious to my
continued mental health.

I'm so angry. bev infuriates me with pandering moaning about
whether I'm ready to own my own house, uhm, hello, 30, not
your fucking child, not going to treat you like a surrogate.
I fucking hate these people, my mothers friends, they're
like a plague, continually shouting affectations of glee
about my mother. they didn't know her very well, and they
sure as shit don't fucking know me. I want nothing to do
with them, but I have to deal with them until everything's
settled. It's a pain in the ass. but whatever. Bev has her
own agenda, and as executor it's her prorogation to decide
what is or what doesn't happen. I'm going to get fucked over
by my mother, again, and she's not even alive. it's typical

sigh. so, I'm just going to be the dutiful child. but hell
if I'm going to sit around and do nothing while bev sells
the house to one of her children, ones a moron whose
girlfriend lives with the family, the other, amy, well, I
haven't anything to say about her, other than she's a snob,
which isn't a bad thing, it's what I always liked about her,
even when we were kids.

I just want to move on with my life, use these new resources
I'm entitled to, regardless of if I'm really or not, but I
have them, so I'm going to use them. I'm just going to have
to suffer all of my mothers friends until the dust clears
and I have a clear picture of what's going on. these people
just make me sick.

condescending and vapid. they think I'm stupid. they think I
couldn't possibly know whats going on. sigh.

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