Middle Child

Listen. Don't Speak.
2008-09-27 14:35:22 (UTC)

How it went..

The date was postponed for a few hours; he wasn't feeling
well. I honestly thought he would have cancelled, i'm glad
he didn't.

I was feeling extremely nervous until my ex-bf called 4
times and send me a rude text msg. I got really pissed at
how clever he uses his words and how he tries to put the
blame on me now. I want nothing to do with him anymore, yet
he says he needs to talk about the 'relationship'. There is
NO relationship! I ended it 2 weeks ago. He knows where i
stand. What is there to talk about?!

Anyways, it calmed me down and for the rest of the day I was
excited and glad that was going on a date tonight.

How did the date go...?

Well, I got a lot of mixed messages from him (and I thought
girls were complicating).

In the beginning he kept huffing and i called him on it, he
said he just wasn't feeling well and that his back was
hurting him. We walked for a bit and found a bench. We sat
pretty close next to each other. I began to feel cold and he
put his arm on my lap and I put my hand in his sweater
pocket, lol. cute. We people watched for about 2 hours until
it started to rain a bit. During that time he was.. I don't
know, kind of annoying actually. He started saying shit
about he's gay and we started pointing out guys. Then he was
telling me how he likes huge asses.


when we left, we went into the mall and found a comfortable
bench to sit on. This is weird I was a bit confused because
we got closer. Our heads were closer then before and he had
his arm around me and he was caressing my love handle
because he knows I hate that part of my body, but he thought
it was cute. Then he had me sit on his lap and we talked. At
one point I had my back turned, I was fixing my hair and
right next to us was a window! HAHA I saw his reflection! He
was looking at me up ad down and when I turned around he
looked elsewhere! LOL. What does that mean?!! A lot of the
times I would catch him from the corner of my eye looking at
me. He really liked my eyes, maybe that's why. He kissed me
twice on the nose!!!!!!!!!!!
Ahhhh it was soooo cute! But i didn't feel anything...

I don't know.. He seemed to not want to be there in the
beginning and because of that I started to become quiet.
Throughout the night I kinda mentioned how i should go home,
but he didn't want to (was it because he wanted to spend
more time with me?..LOL). And how he was so distant and
annoyed and then he changed to becoming more affectionate
near the end. Ugh..

I spoke to my friend when I was on my way home. I told her I
wouldn't mind going on a second date, maybe he'll feel more
comfortable then. I also told her that I didn't really feel
anything. It felt like I was just out with a person.

What is with me.. I don't get attached. Wait..hahaha I'm
actually pretty fuckin' glad i'm like this.

Whatever, I just want to know what he thought of the night.

Actually, he asked me and I said it was fun. He questioned
me again and i said that i like to just chill and he said he
liked it too.

To be honest, just sitting around was fine for me. It's not
someting I would like to do all the time, but it was nice.

HAHAHAHA.. I HAVE TO ADD THIS. When i sat on his lap, he was
still at my height. With my ex, when I sat on his lap, he
was still short. This italian guy was a good height.

Hmm.. we'll see.