am_I_human

more human than human
2008-01-11 22:23:35 (UTC)

Surrender

All day people turn to me
For every answer to
every little problem
And I have to paste a look
of confidence to
ease their fears
I'm paid to make it look easy
when I'm shaking on the inside and I
have no one to answer to
except myself.
I want to surrender,
Some days I just want to give up
completely is it
wrong that I want someone else
to take care of me
Just once in a while.
I don't want to think about
what to do next or
solve another problem I just
want someone other than me
to take care of me...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Seriously. How many massage therapists want to come home
and give someone a massage? How many warehouse labourers
really want to spend their day off helping someone move?
Not very many.

....

So why is it wrong for me to want one day a week where I'm
not responsible for everything around me? It's my goddamn
day off. I don't want to do four loads of laundry and a
load of dishes and vaccuum and dust and scrub the toilet
and wipe the counters and bring someone their goddamn work
phone because they forgot it and take out garbage and
clean the cat box and reorganize the mess that is our
apartment and everything else that I have to do because if
I don't it's just going to pile up and make me miserable
and cause a big fight and either I'll be the one to end up
doing it, or someone else will and I'll feel bad about it.

FOR FUCKS SAKE.

***breathe***

Please. Someone. Anyone. Do...anything. something.




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