Middle Child

I hate pictures

So the clubbin' pictures are now on facebook. I fuckin' hate
facebook. I look so ugly. I'm ugly. I restricted the photos
so no one can see my pictures but me. I'm ugly. I'm stupid.
I shouldn't even be in school. Maybe that's why my ex ended
it with me. I'm ugly and stupid. The only thing he probably
liked about me was my body, more particular my ass. I was
hoping when I grew up I would look different. I'm still my
ugly self. My face looks like a guy. I should have been a
boy. I'm more boy then my little brother as weird as that
sounds.

Shit, like, what's this life lesson of failing and being
ugly suppose to teach me? I have friends that are hot and
friends that are ugly. I treat them equally. As for doing
horrible in school? Is it suppose to encourage me? Hmmmmmmmm
IT's HASN'T BEEN WORKING FOR THE PAST 7 YEARS!

I'm scared to tell anyone about my last exam. 38.5%!! FUCK.
I;ve been getting the lowest mark in the class!!!! That's
fuckin pathetic. I'm one fuckin' dumbass who's wasting my
dad's money.

I have no emotion to that mark. I don't feel like crying. I
don't feel like being happy and I don't feel sorry? It's
like I expect it to happen. I read all the material, but did
i understand it? I thought I did. What do i change? I need
to know what to do to change this? Whatever it is i;m doing
isn't effective at all! I need some help. I think my school
offers some study guidance.