lee_the_messed_up_punk

my #ucked up life
2007-09-21 22:57:23 (UTC)

long away from poetry

5:12PM

I got to talk to my case worker today after trying to
sleep for as long as possible but the dreams began to get
longer and the time got faster so it was almost like
torturing myself until I finally realized the promises I've
made to god that I would make good out of my life and
sleeping days away seems like the wrong way to go. My
worker made an appointment with me for next week at 1:15PM
on Tuesday, already making progress getting my ass out of
bed even though it can get so tempting after your body
awakes from good REM sleep, to fall back.
I've gone so many long amounts of time without REM
sleep, while young and now that it's easy to realize when
you have because of the way your body is moving, feeling,
and how your mind is thinking. You can last about twenty
minutes awake while your mind is still in that mode and
easily fall back asleep but after a half an hour, if you've
slept more then five hours your mind goes into awake mode
and to fall back asleep is almost impossible. For anyone
with bi-poler disorder, they probably know how easy it is
to sleep for really long amounts of time while in
depressive state as opposed to there manic state where REM
sleep is almost unheard of.

I'm slightly manic right now so I just called the
pharmacy to see if they can refill my meds early. The
person I talked to said yes but I've had that happen
before, being denied when I get there. Maybe when I get
back I'll feel a little better and write some more or work
on a song, it's been too long away from poetry, that place.

Off to walk...

lee




Ad: