Me acting tired and raging assholes
i haven't gotten much sleep as of late, chalk it up to our
lovely neighbors who are a one-hour special of 'Cops -
Domestic Abuse' just waiting to happen; or chalk it up to me
having horrible anxiety attacks, acting like a little bitch
due to my interviews and my life being on the line at
(seemingly) every moment.
well i actually do quite well without sleep, so long as i
can focus on something (mostly work if possible); but then
there are times like administrative law which just make it
impossible for me to not act like a slack-jawed idiot. so
there i was listening to my teacher who looks like death
warmed over drone on about the implementation of decision
making via adjudicatory processes versus rule-making when i
noticed the girl next to me (kim, a quite nice girl) surfing
a website which was named something like "funny dogs".
funny they were. some were reading newspapers, some were
wearing oversized sunglasses obviously not fit for a golden
retriever. i was staring at them feverently once in a while
giving a grunt of satisfaction (mostly when a bulldog
wearing a toupee came up on the screen).
well i didn't notice that kim had noticed me grunting and
staring at her computer. there i was semi-slouched over
towards her (and in retrospect probably a bit uncomfortably
close) and when the pictures didn't change for quite some
time i looked up at her. she was grinning at me from ear to
"you like dogs?" she whispered
"i want a bulldog." what the hell was that? a declaratory
statement? i can do better than that!
so she continued to flip through some more pictures then
went back to note-taking. i memorized the website address
and pulled it up on my laptop.
so there i was during admministrative law surfing
www.funnydog.net i let out my usual grunt of satisfaction
when a canine with a particular ammusing personification
came onto my screen; then i looked to my left.
to my left sits a dude who must weight about 600 lbs and is
always sucking down diet cokes. he's always following
baseball games on his laptop and immediately voiced his
disapproval of my "taking up the whole damn space between
us" with my "god-damned books".
so there he was and he was leaning back in his chair
alternatively staring at the dogs and me. i just wish i
could tell what was going through his mind at that moment.
so i was saying how the school does a great job of not
making it too competitive between studetns for these on
campus interviews; but of course the school is no match for
the narcisstical. let's take peter.
i first met peter after property one day when we were headed
into contracts. some of the people were leaving the class
before us and i got into one of those "move at the same time
the other person moves" awkward alteracations with this
girl. we kind of did the silly laugh that is mandatory with
that, with peter next to me, snorting, "why do you have to
be such an asshole, can't you just let her out?"
both the girl and i were taken aback, but hey...i had no
perfect retort which is always so lame.
anyhow, he and i debated quite a lot in class, sometimes he
won, sometimes i won. i think he's a really smart guy but
his egg-headed head sitting on his pencil thin neck must be
filled with delusions of grandeur.
he was the first to let out his class rank and his gpa
(without even being prompted for it). he's always casually
slide it into conversation.
so there i was sitting with allison, jeff, and jessica at
the cafeteria and peter comes by our table (once again
dressed up as i was yesterday).
he paused for a moment next to my chair and did the whole,
"looking for someone else...oops not here, might as well
talk to you guys routine", then he looked down at me,
"you're not dressed up today? no interviews?"
i guess he meant this as causal banter but it came out as
"any of you guys have one?" he looked up at my 3 companions.
now i'm willing to give this kid the benefit of a doubth,
that he was just making casual conversation, but this all
just came out like he was a raging asshole.
"do you have one?" allison asked in a mocking tone.
"yes i do." peter said without so much as picking up on the
hint of sarcasm in her voice.
"yep...got it in..." with this he stared at his oversized
watch which made his spindly wrist look even more pathetic,
"in about...10 minutes!"
"good for you." jeff said dryly.
peter lifted his chin up and semi-nodded...i could tell what
he was thinking, "yes...yes...good for me."