lee_the_messed_up_punk

my #ucked up life
2007-09-07 21:20:24 (UTC)

sore thumb

3:47PM Friday

I feel like a new person after finally getting a good
sleep, I stopped shaking and sweating, hearing things and a
few days ago I would have paid my entire check just to be
the way I am now so I really wonder if working is worth
it. I returned a few of the shirts I bought and only kept
the ones I liked the best since I over spent money, not
leaving anything for food and smokes.
The air smells good, my thoughts are clear and that
will be the last time I overtake my meds, I never want to
feel the way I did over the weekend. I've never been that
paranoid in my life and even though I still fear being
jumped by the same group of people at least my meds limit
my fear, I can breath properly, there's color back in my
skin, I got my appetite back and bought chicken that's in
the oven. Like Mary I almost gave up, thinking it wouldn't
go away and learned a very valuable lesson.

I don't know why but It seemed like Pab was mad at me,
maybe it was just the pain he is feeling from cracked skin
on his leg and that he only wanted to give me twelve
tylonal and Mary ended up giving me the other eight. I
found a chord to a stereo behind there couch which I
thought would make him happy but he still looked pissed
off. Since I know the girls need a computer, I took there
monitor to my house so that I can hopefully find the right
drivers, something I couldn't do at there place because
they don't have the internet. They don't know much about
computers so explaining to them why I needed the monitor
was hard but they let me take it any ways.

Right now I'm cooking and for once a happy entry, it's
been a while that I don't have much to bitch about, I can't
remember my dreams which is a good thing, have smokes, a 2L
of rootbeer and some painkillers for my back and arm, some
new pants and shirts, it's cool outside making it a perfect
day to finish a movie I started yesterday featuring The
Rock, who I'm not a fan of but so far it seems like a cool
flick called, 'Walking Tall', so I'm off to eat and finish
the movie.

What a weekend...

My mom is a little sick and my memory of the last week is
blurry, maybe my brain thankfully forgot most of the
terrifying things that happened. If so, it's for the
better.

I can't wait until it rains, I love the smell of fresh rain
and the sound it makes while falling from the sky and
hitting the ground...

My doctor wrote a letter to my boss that states I need two
weeks off and a letter to my landlord and worker that
states I need to re-locate, stating where I'm presently
living is only making my condition worse. I hope I don't
loose my job but if I do I can't let it bother me, I tried
hard and at least made an effort. If I didn't get jumped
and if I didn't run out of my meds I think I would have
been fine so I hope my boss understands and that my worker
helps me find housing somewhere out of the ghetto. I've
been down here since I graduated and it's too much, it's
finally gotten to me after years of being robbed at
convenience stores and on the street. I deserve a break
and want to work but not here, the crime rate has gotten
out of control and I stick out like a sore thumb.

lee




Ad: