lmnosoup

Love and its many wonders...
2007-08-09 03:34:06 (UTC)

Nights are taking a toll on me...

I hate working nights. Right now I am working 4 nights
out of the work week and it sucks. I love working with my
Erin on M and T but it still sucks that it is a night
shift. I NEVER see Jabe and we live together. It is just
too hard. I am too emotional and too upset all the time
over little things and it sucks.

But, on the brighter side I applied for 6 different
positions yesterday, er today, (another reason I hate
working nights) and hopefully one of those comes through.

I miss Jabe so much. I can feel it through my entire
body. It just, hurts. My heart is constantly dropping
and I talk to him more on the phone then I do any other
time. When we are together I feel like I am right on top
of him because I just want him near me and I am constantly
apologizing for everything because I feel bad that I work
nights (because it is technically my fault). I just hate
this. I miss Jabe so much it makes me cry.

My boss also told me that I would not start teaching at
the beginning of the school year and I would still be
doing nights. She said it so matter of fact like. Like
it was no big deal. It is a big deal this is my life.
She said that I wasn't a "key person, like main course
teachers and bus riders". Screw her. I hope I get one of
these jobs.




Ad: