Drama (swear words included)
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2007-06-21 20:07:09 (UTC)

Heartbroken --- 6/21/07 @ 4pm

So, of course today.. I am heartbroken.. after a long,
painful resolution of things with Lou. I am officially
heart-broken, and this I know, because I have cried
thousands of tears for this man.. and he couldn't care
less!! That is WHY I am so HEARTBROKEN!!

This is the email I sent him earlier, just clearing up
everything that I have to say to him .. just so that I can
have a little bit of closure.

So here is the email:

Honestly, Lou, I just want you to know what is going
through my head, regardless of whether or not you feel the
same. You were an amazing guy at first, you wanted me to be
involved in every aspect of your life - your family, your
kids, your home. I loved it, having someone to wake up
beside every morning was absolutely amazing. But
progressively, it got worse between us and I guess I just
didn't want to see the signs, but you started blowing me
off @ karaoke shows, or showing up late, or not calling,
and not showing me affection. I just kept making excuses,
hoping that everything would be back to the way it was
before when we truly cared about each other. Our sex was
really great when we started.. and I really THOUGHT & FELT
like we both had our hearts and our minds involved - and it
showed... Last night, I was so hurt because I really got
the message that you don't want anything to do with me
romantically and all I felt like all I am to you is
a 'lay'. Lou, I cannot go there with you (and just have
sex).... because I have TRUE feelings for you - and
sleeping with someone that I love without you feeling the
same.. god IT HURTS SO BAD. I really don't know what to do,
I honestly feel so lost and hurt. Lou, I know that this
will probably not change a thing... it was absolutely
devastating walking out your room and you didn't have
anything to say.. like .. i need you or i want you .. or
anything. All i ever really asked for was to feel wanted
and needed and to be told the TRUTH. I had to at least get
this off of my chest, do with it what you will. My heart
feels literally broken.

Kane & Miranda both are welcome to call me anytime. I would
still love to see him play football.


I would like you to write me back, but if everything I said
was true, and you have no feelings for me, then I guess
don't write back. Then - at least I'll know. Tell
Kane "Good Luck" with the football thing... and Miranda
just tell her I said that she is such a beautiful young
lady - and I ABSOLUTELY enjoyed both Miranda and Kane's
company. Please, just tell them that they are always
welcome to call anytime!


I Think I will move on and be an itch scratcher, like your
other friends. Love sucks.


well i guess NOW i know how you feel, was that so hard?
thanks for letting me know that i'm just a fuck.

p.s. love doesn't suck. you suck for not appreciating it.

move on? you've been gone.. for a long time.

i thought you loved me and NEXT TIME you really should NOT
say "I LOVE YOU" unless you truly mean it.

So that is where I stand right now.. I'm totally sad and
disappointed, I thought that he would at least give a
shit.. but no he didn't!