2007-04-13 09:56:52 (UTC)


In the past couple of months, I've had much time to think.
I have attempted to accelerate my skills and build up on
who I am and what I will eventually do.

I've got a million if not more, epiphanies about life,
work, school, friends, happiness, etc... They are trying
to all come out of me at the same time right now:

1. Work traps you in a way. The better the job the more
you conform to meet the requirements of the company.

2. The point of life is to make it what you will

3. Judgement is all in your head, and unneccessary thing
to function.

4. TRUTH = Everybodies goal is to be aCCEPTED

5. Anything you want you get if you will it to be. If it's
important enought, what will be, will be.

I believe I might be on a brink of depression. In times
like these, one would think that it is only a place to
better myself and have things finally work. This is not so.

I wanted to move out for a very long time now. I'm almost
done with my dental work, I have some assets (car, laptop,
boyfriend), Mother has finally decided to leave bozo
behind. GREAT!!! 1 problem still... I wanna move out,
wanna own my own place, but we are still gonna have to
take care of her. Arthur is probably gonna get promoted
and move to Delaware. WTF will happen to us then? We kinda
depend on his income, and if he leaves, then my saving
strategy will be forfit, and I might get in a cycle where
I get stuck with mom. Idealy I would like her to live in
her own comdo, like Karoline's mom, or live with either me
or danish in a two family building that we biught
together. I love my mom and don't want to abandon her, but
the time for the baby to fly out of the nest is definately
upon us, and I would like to go off on my own for a little
bit. I can return later, but I need my wild time

Do I? All my life I am obsessed with the movie perfect