thecommonthread

The Common Thread
2007-04-09 19:51:30 (UTC)

forgiveness.

i was delirious as i weaved in and out of the dotted lines of the freeway. the
clock read 6:23, but i quickly calculated that to mean 6:06. the sun hadn't
begun to rise yet and i was glad. i wanted to exist in darkness. my secrets
seemed better concealed that way. i listened to the same song on repeat the
entire way home. whether it was out of laziness or masochism, i will never
know.

when i arrived home, the house was completely silent. i moved as softly and
quietly as possible, for fear that even bumping into the end table might unleash
a tidal wave of the past 12 hours all over the living room floor. instead, i carry it
in a coffee mug. enough coffee for one, maybe two.

i could've burned my clothes. if they weren't my favorites. instead, they lay in a
heap on the floor of my bedroom. i slept in nothing. as i climbed into my bed,
my sheets scorned me. they all but fled to the other side of my queen in
abhorrence of my behavior. they refused to heat above the touch of my bare
skin. i sat completely still for hours. i refused to complain.

this morning i feel different. it was all a dream. it was a mistake of a past that
never happened. i hardly remember it anymore.




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