So yesterday was pretty drab, but last night was great. I
met up with Shawn, and we hung out for a little bit. We
drove around for like an hour and talked, it was so nice.
then I got sick of driving and we went back to his place
and sat in my car and talked for like another couple of
hours, anyways the thing I think I love most is the way he
hugs. Like we will be kissing and the next thing I know I
am being given the nicest hug in the world. Like one of
those "you don't have to worry, I'll make sure no one hurts
you" They are so nice. It seems like When I am with him
nothing can go wrong. I just wish I could figure out what
to do about everything. I hate being confused and
unknowing, it drives me insane. I wish Shawn would just
ask me out, so my choice would be made, but on the other
hand I don't want him to ask me out, because I don't want
to hurt our friend that I used to date or my boyfriend.
My boyfriend has been a little bit nicer latley but nothing
to really talk about. He still is lying and would rather
hang out and play video games and sleep than spend anytime
with me. He always tells me, "Tomorrow I'll stay in and
spend time with you" Then tomorrow comes, and he wants to
go and party. I like to go and party too but I work six
days a week to support the both of us, because he is to
lazy to get a job. Anything would be better than nothing,
but he doesn't even pick up the paper once. He just sits
there hoping that maybe a job will jump into his lap.
AHHHHHHHHH!!! I guess I am just going to sit back and wait
to see what life is going to bring me.