My Brain Continues To Work Despite The Noise
Well the first day of the I won't get pissed off mantra
didn't go as planned. I did okay on the how long they
slept thing but it was harder on the what to do first when
one or most of them are crying thing. I think the one baby
has two teeth coming in and the other girl has the habit
of wanting to get anything the other babies have including
pacifiers, bottles or the baby themself. I am so tired of
moving bouncy seats out of the area because this little
butt has to be on top of or in the middle of everything. I
don't think she learns from her mistakes because even if
you let her fall she still thinks that it won't happen the
next time. I minnie popped her on her butt today. A big no-
no. Like she has so much padding on her tush anyway
between the diaper and her fatness. I shouldn't have done
that, I could have gotten fires for that, but she stopped
for alittle while. But not that long, or long enough to
warrent getting trouble for something as stupid as that.
So this is an addendum to my mantra. I can get frustrated
when they cry but I need to find another way of dealing
with it than taking it out on the silly child. That was
where my mother made her mistake and I won't repeat her
ill advised reactions. Can't control it.
But anyway I also need to try to communicate better with
the kids as I am doing whatever. I notices that when I am
upset I shut down and I think they pick up on that emotion
and get even more fussy. Especially Joey.
I did succeed in not doing things before Shannon did them.
If they didn't get done they just got left. Except the
dishes. That did pose a frustration issue. I mean rinse
the damn things out already. I left them in the sink
around 12 and when I got back from my lunch at 2-ish they
were still there.
I also did well when I left for lunch I didn't have the
compulsion to change everyone's diapers. In the past I
would stay and do that so the person left in the room
would have less to do. Dumb!! Like they can't do it?
I did do better in remembering a pattern of when to change
or feed but I have noticed I have gotten more irritable
when I eat so I need to start bringing more snacks so my
suger doesn't get so fubared.
I need to plan what I do ahead of time so I don't drive
myself nuts. Sometimes I find myself going over and over
what needs to be done. But I think that may be a
compulsion to keep checking and a sugar balance issue.
Even I don't want to be known as someone who talks to
herself I need to start doing mental checklists. i don't
want to get hung up on the bad parts of the job so much
that I get burned out. Like Liz. Not a good thing.
And I need to remember I won't have 7 babies for forever.
Joey will be gone in Sept and Sia soon after. Then Orio.
So that will leave us with 5 even with the new baby Lucy
who is only coming two days a week. Odd but okay. So the
only nut will be Jaeden. Oh my gosh she will be the only
one crawling. God help us.
Will write more tomorrow.