i was thinking if i should write this entry. i was doing so
well in not thinking about him. this is the second long
holiday i have since my university life started and i did
pretty good job in forgetting him last holiday. but not
today. not today. i miss him terribly today. i'm all getting
mushy. they said there won't be flame if there's no spark.
i'll tell you what the spark is.
i went to wesley methodist church with eunice today. it was
a holy communion sunday. and the congregation had to go to
the altar and kneel down to be served with bread and wine.
it took a fraction of second for me to start thinking about
him once i realised that people started going to the front.
i miss him terribly. we first met in acs(i) methodist
church. that was the first time i saw him and he was sitting
beside me. and i was in love, at first sight.
i miss him so. every moments in my life with him in it is
isolated from others. i can remember so clearly almost every
single moments with him. i'm so filled with love for him and
yet i could not have him. his doings hurt me lotsa of time.
but everytime the anger will subside and my heart will once
again be overflowed with love for him. i have never been so
much in love before. it kills me to think of how deep is my
love for him. it kills me.