slave jess

Journal of Joels slave
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2006-05-25 22:26:50 (UTC)

sub diary 25-05-06


today was counselling day. the counsellor actually
apologised to me for what she said last week. that made me
feel good. she also helped me with other things in my life
right now. she was nice today.

after counselling i go do some retail therapy. today was
no different. most days Master hasnt been home until about
10pm so i thought the same today. when i got home i
realised that He had emailed me to say He was having an
earlier night and that He would be home around 8pm. there
were also offlines from Master. i felt so bad that i had
not been home to chat earlier.

Wwe managed to have a nice chat with only a brief
interuption. Master had been chatting with 'p'. there was
something that i had said previously to Master that He had
misinterpreted. i crave spanking & light pain but Master
thought i craved punishment. to be punished is terrible.
i hate being punished as it shows that i have failed my
Master in some way. i hate to fail Master.

a spanking can be punishment but sometimes i just need to
be spanked etc to clear my head of all thoughts. it allows
me to go to a warm secure place and Master can do this for
me. i never go there when i am being punished.

all my love
slave jessica {MJ}