Ms. R

Assimilated
2006-05-10 19:21:47 (UTC)

One Hundred Ninety-Third Entry- 5-9-06

I think men, in general, dont really know what they want.
They THINK they do, but they dont. And all I do is scratch
my head.

B2 decided he wanted to get together last night. So I
agreed. I wont go into what transpired...its really not
noteworthy anyway.

This morning, he decides to have twinges of guilt. He sends
me a message that he is more in love with his g/f every day
and has decided that he wants to concentrate on her, his
weight and other aspects of his life and even though our
meetings were "fun" he cant see me anymore. And he
apprecitated my patience and understanding.

Gee....my heart is broken...LOL!!

I remember saying to him, several months ago, something
very similar to that...and he agreed. And, a week later, he
was sniffing after me again. What a hypocrate!

If that guy can hold ON to that woman for any extended
length of time it wont be because he tried. It will be
because she is as clueless as HE is.

Anyway, I messaged him back I the whole thing was HIS idea
and I certainly understood. He did offer to loan me the
money to pay off my credit card and I asked if that offer
was still valid. He didnt reply...although he was online.
He thought he was invisible. He doesnt realize I can SEE
him when he is invisible. I asked him why he was hiding and
less than a minute later, he signed off. So I sent one more
message. I said he if wants to treat me like I dont exist
because HE had a guilty conscience, thats not MY problem.
And I told him a friend wouldnt treat another friend so
shabbily.

He will probably counter with some indignant reply. So let
him. I freely admit my own certain dysfunctions......if he
cant do the same, he doesnt deserve my friendship.

My SIL asked me if I would continue to clean my ex's house
twice a month for $60. I said SURE....and I appreciated it.
And it appears she is going to have the gastric bypass
surgery. I sure hope she knows what she is doing. She is
treating the symptom....but not the CAUSE...of her obesity.

My ex called and told me my first payment from my client
was at the house. Thats good news. I just wish I didnt have
to spend everything on my car insurance. But thats the
current priority.

I have had an nearly insatiable craving for MILK for the
last several days. I dont know why but I cant seem to get
enough milk. Thank goodness I like skim milk. But I am
having the craving again now. I guess I will go get some
water instead. I need that too.




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