ErykahKayne

My Daily Bread
2006-02-24 18:33:33 (UTC)

skeletons

what it do, what the business is?.... I took Blaccie to
work earlier..he got some training class. Anyway, The
bank still hasn't called me. is no news good news? I don't
know but i'm not stressing. i realized today.with the help
of my Mother of course that Daniel prayed for 21 days
before he saw results..so that gave me motivation to not
give up. I WILL get the job i want and that's that. I
also talked to LIsa..boy i tell ya..she is one freakin i
hate to say it cuzz she's my sister but CON ARTIST!!! so
today she tells me, why don't u move bacc here? i don't
even know why u left in the first place. BISH! u DO know
why i left..to start over and get my shit together..her
ass wasn't trying to help and me and Blaccie were just
about..fucc it i'll keep it real we had hit an all time
low and i had to come to bacc to my mama lol.. NOW she
wanna say "u can buy my car for 200$" why is it that i can
but it NOW but when i was there she ain't want me driving
it cuzz i was with "him"? ain't that trifling? i know, i
know..sometimes i wonder if we're even related.. and
what's in it for her. The only reaon i'll move bacc is
for job opportunites which brings me to this..of course
she sas her job (National city bank) is hiring and i
should put in for it. so i'm going to do it over the
computer. maybe next month, if i'm not working i can go to
Ohio and attend the job fair. I don't really want to move
though..but i need a job that pays good money which is why
i want the bank job..plus, it's so me..even though i don't
like being around that much money that ain't mine..i was
gon make the sacrifice.. At Lisa's job i would be doing
Customer Service..i guess that's alright..she makes good
money though so that can change my tune real quicc.

for some reason last night i was thinking about Mike..ugh!
What the fucc for?....but i've come to realize some
things..1) i shouldn't hate him.. 2) i guess i had my part
in this ordeal with him not seeing Jamyah and all.. but i
like to blame it all on him. it is MOSTLY his fault though
lol..but i guess i could've put forth some kind of
heartfelt effort. if only for Jamyah. but i see it like
this, he made it clear that he didn't want to be part of
her life so why should i chase his cracca ass down and try
to make him? i don't feel like i should, so i haven't. and
i probably won't unless she REALLY wants to know who he
is. But i don't think that will be an issue once she
learns what a freakin daedbeat he is. She has me, and
Reggie and that's about as good as it's gon get. We are as
good as it gets actually. Why do i hate him so much? Him
not doing anything for his daughter is reason enough, but
i think it's deeper than that. Plus, the fact that he's
white maybe..i don't know. u know i'm not too fond of them
in the first place.. Wait i take that bacc.. i'm
indifferent towards him. i don't hate him..but i don't
like him either. i don't hate him because he hasn't done
anything to me. i mean, this is not someone who hurt me
deeply..or scarred me in any way. But i don't LIKE him
and we could never be friends because of how he treated my
daughter. and the lacc of recogniton he's shown her.. so
yeah, i don't hate him..i have no feelings for him
whatsoever and it's been like that since before i had her,
so that's where i'm at with that. why did i even talk to
him? i guess God was trying to tell me something because
LORD KNOWS i don't like no white folks..except Jamyah
lol..i could talk about this all day...

i need to take my skirt bacc to JC Penny's..then i want to
go to Target, i know they got some kinda sale going on. I
wonder if they have a Kohl's here..i love that store! ever
since i bought a blazer there for 5 freakin dollars i've
been addicted to it. let me go, i need to think




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