blkdragon

grounded
2006-02-11 04:51:28 (UTC)

Heyday's and heresay

2/9/06 On time today, worked with Brian all day, danced and
sang the monotony away; went to sleep in my car for lunch.
Rob looked rather stupid this morning, I didn’t have
anything to say to him, he’s been bought and paid for; if
he were a man I’d step to him about the bitch shit he’s
been doing. The fact that I ignored him left a mark, the
only thing I can do with a pussy is fuck him, no one here
is worth that effort. Rob went to Matt and told him that he
needed to talk to him, Matt and I’ve been talking and
joking for days now, I’m happy for him; his relationship
with Jenn and her Daughter seems to be just what they all
needed. I stopped and talked to Jenn for a minute this
morning, told her that I’m happy for her, that Matt loves
her and she told me that she loves him as well, the
relationship has mellowed him out and he loves the little
girl.
After lunch, Rob said hi to me, his tone was almost
imperceptible; he wasn’t sure I’d respond. When I found out
the he-said/she-said shit, I commented to Rob, “now I have
to be careful whom I speak to”? He knew the question
pertained to my talking to him, about whatever, when
someone talks to me; whatever they’ve said stays with me.
Rob has already proven to be bitch-made. I responded when
he said hi, didn’t mean I intended to have any
conversations with him, he can’t keep his mouth shut unless
there’s food in it.
Betty had something she wanted to tell me or ask me today,
she didn’t wait for me to punch out though, she said she’d
talk to me after work. Just finished having toast and
coffee, I’ll shower and head for the rink, don’t think I’ll
see anyone there; I won’t be looking for anyone though.
12:36 am Charles came by earlier, he’s no longer at Eva’s.
He told me that while he was elsewhere, someone molested
Xavier Monday morning, it’s a big story that I’ve yet to
get to the bottom of; I’ll see Eva.
While Charles was at my place, Patty called me, she told me
that she still didn’t feel all that good and asked me where
I thought she was; I imagined her to be at the hospital.
She told me that she was in the parking lot at the rink
waiting for me, asked how long I’d be, I told her that I
was on my way out the door and I’d be 30 minutes; she had
the half-off coupon thing happening, as if I cared about
that. I dropped Charles off and got on the thruway, Patty
rings again to ask my eta, I tell her 15 minutes and ring
off. She calls again to tell me that she can’t wait to go
inside, I tell her to go in, she says she’ll pay the
entrance for us both; I’m not in the least bit concerned.
She told me that Sheridan had arrived, described what he
carried, any way she can touch me is what she does.
I get to the rink, the attendant (Skip’s Daughter)
says, “your friend paid for you” and hands me my ticket; I
find Patty still putting her skates on. “You’ve really got
to work on that patience thing,” I tell her, she told me
that she knew that, I’ve waited a lot longer than 15
minutes for her.
I skated to Donnell Jones tonight, a slow roll, rolling
slow is infinitely harder than not; I’m constantly working
on my balance. Patty was still coughing and decided to
leave, I stopped to tell her to take better care of
herself, Kelly certainly isn’t; she left. 5 minutes later
she came back into the rink, I looked at her and asked what
was wrong, she was in a bit of a shock; she directed my
sight to her rear window. I asked what happened to the
window, she told me that she got in the car, closed the
door and the window shattered; I thought she went to her
car and found it like that.
She’s going to have to pay for the repairs, she streamlined
her insurance coverage and it won’t cover the repair, I
told her to have her Father fit a piece of plexiglass in
the window space. She’s going to call a service that will
repair the windshield while she’s working. I told her to be
careful going home tonight, to clear the glass from the car
before going into her apartment, hell; let Kelly handle it.
2/10/06 On time this morning, imagine that, can’t afford to
lose 2 ½ hours of pay per week; after my deductions, it’s
just not enough money. I’m going to have to look at my
deductions carefully, seems I’m paying over $1000 a month
for insurance and taxes. I worked with Brian today, a woman
named Laura was asked to work at this machine and Jody
wouldn’t work with her, they allowed that bullshit to fly;
I said I’d work with her and she’s ok with me. Laura and I
talked all day, I wouldn’t hold two minutes worth of
conversation with Jody, I’d have turned my music on; she’s
stuck on herself and she’s not attractive by my standards.
Laura has a Daughter (1yr) named Saeryn, I think it’s a
beautiful name. Both Rob and Jody watched the interaction
between Laura and myself, Laura told me that one of them
would approach me to ask what we discussed, I told her they
wouldn’t consider intruding on my space in that fashion;
neither of them could intimidate me if I were tied up.
Laura mentioned the various cliques at the plant, I told
her that I don’t belong to any of them. She told me that
Lavon stepped to her one day, began swearing at her and
told her that he’s very protective of Rob, perhaps he
should sleep with him; we’re talking about men here and who
needs to protect a man that’s being bitched out by a woman?
Day before yesterday, I was working with Matt and Lavon
came over to invite either Matt or both of us to the Malt
River Brewing Company for beer and pool, Matt said that
he’s in a rush to get home to his Family and I had to
wonder why neither of them were? Apparently Rob and Lavon
are boring each other and needed new blood, ergo the
invitation, Matt wasn’t even considering it. With the
recent situation with Rob and his declining my personal
chef invitation, there’s no reason for me to want to hang
out with them on a Friday after work, even though I thought
it a good idea at first.
I’d gone to the bathroom, stepped outside to light a
cigarette, began walking back to the work station and
decided to stop at the room Lisa was working in, I spoke to
her jokingly and she responded, I went into the room to
speak to her; believing it a good opportunity to clear the
air. I told her that we have a problem that I didn’t cause,
that we were the victims of heresay, I know that what she
heard hurt her as much as it hurt me; I told her that I
care too much about her to hurt her deliberately.
I gave her a brief synopsis of the course of events leading
to the current situation, she saw the truth in my eyes, we
were both being moved by the spirit of our feelings for one
another, I told her that we’d talk in depth soon; that one
day we’d do lunch together and discuss everything pertinent
to us. I told her about not choosing to relate to women
that I work with and why, how I’d decided to change my mind
by inviting her to dine with me. The problem I have,
there’s chemistry between us, my body betrays me when I
think of/see or am near her and I don’t want to use her in
that fashion. It would be another matter entirely, if she
wanted me too, I know all that’s involved during intimacy
with a woman; even if she doesn’t know. A woman doesn’t
open her body to a man without opening her heart, I’m not
sure I’m willing to give my heart to Lisa, the differences
between us seem not to lend themselves to a melding. All
things being considered, I’m glad we’re on our way back to
where we were before the dickhead’s interference.
Going to be at the church in the morning, 9am, for the pre-
Valentine’s Day Brunch; I called Cheetah to confirm her
appearance. She’s expecting to be there @ 9 also, depending
on how well Mouse wakes and gets out of bed. I won’t be
going to church on Sunday, really don’t want to spend three
hours listening to the Pastor when I could be sleeping,
we’ll see; there’s also the gas concern. 24miles roundtrip,
two days in a row, is half my allotment of gas for the
week; I’ll commune with God from here. I’ll be doing the
parenting class on Monday, another 24miles, I’m committed
for the 8 weeks; I’m going to have to give up church for
financial reasons. If I decide to attend services
regularly, it’ll have to be a church closer to my apartment.
Still haven’t heard from Donny, I better call Donna
tomorrow, make sure everything is ok. I meant to call JW,
I’ll do that after the brunch, I’m helping Charles get his
things from Eva’s tomorrow and Jason’s supposed to come by.
Haven’t heard from Patty, I told her that I wouldn’t be
calling her numbers, I meant that; when she frees herself
from her current situation things will change.




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