nin137

Nick's Journal
2006-01-27 01:37:47 (UTC)

Syllogism of Hatred

it's been a while since i've written, this is mainly because
i was violently ill for about a week. see every year i'm
stricken down by some debilitating sickness. the winner
this year was a good old fashioned stomach virus, and my-my
it was some stomach virus. it was the kind where right
after you're meekly dragging the 64 oz. of gatorade you just
bought out of the store and suddenly the pangs of vomit hit
you. which is when you realize that you have never really
been to the bathrooms in this store, hell you don't even
know if they have any bathrooms.
after two dry-heaves around the pharmacy you slide into a
stinking ass stall and vomit into the nasty ass toilet-bowl.
it is actually quite similar to freshmen year in college.
anyhow, i am back and ready to write!
the topic today is hatred, more specifically racism. why
the topic? well because i was confronted with a truly
racist person today. for some unknown reason i have been
having to spend more time with clients lately and that
involves taking them out to lunch. we were entertaining
some dude with his (very hot) assistant. now not only was i
positive that he was fucking her, but i was also positive
that they were truly what they seemed. he a very stupid
tool, with the good ole' boy mentality. she a very good
looking god-fearing not necessarily stupid but hasn't
experienced life beyond her segregated southern style
attitude. well i had the pleasure of helping her find a
parking space. we were getting out of the car when this
black guy stepped out of the car next to us. quite suddenly
i have to admit, but her reaction was crazy.
"oh my god."
and with this she slammed her door shut. i was already out
side of the car with the door ajar, standing there
completely perplexed. i looked into the car and saw her
staring at the black guy, who by now was staring at her as
well.
of course she was really embarrassed, but i knew what she
wsa thinking: "he's going to rob/rape/steal my car." the
beauty of it was that she was in some shitty car and the
black dude stepped out of a fucking mercedes!!
anyhow. this leads me to racism and hatred. you see i hate
how these are interchangeable. i believe you can be racist
without hating someone. in my book racism means that you
attribute something to a person simply because you
generalize that he would have that attribute solely due to
his race. now this does not mean that you HATE that person
for that. it simply means that you attribut something to
someone. i believe a little bit of seinfeld wisdom is due here.
remember the episode where the woman pretends to be asian
and seinfeld defends how one should be rightfully outraged as,
"people trust asians in their judgement".
where elaine calls him out for being racist (i.e. he just
said something hateful) to which he retorts,
"if it's something positive, is it racist?"
the deal is that that is an ironic statement (as most of
jerry's are) in that it IS racist, but not in the hateful
sense that elaine pre-supposes.
which brings me to my point. there are certain things i
"observe" of black people which are racist. for example:
black people always order, they never ask. i'm damn
serious, i worked at a pizzeria for 2 years and every black
person ever has ordered like this,
"yeah, um, gimme ah"
i'm dead fucking serious. listen closely to the next black
person that orders in front of you. i swear to god that is
the way they will do it (but don't step too closely cos they
are armed to the teeth).
hatred is something that always shocks me and probably the
only thing that scares me (next to asians driving). you see
when that girl today did what she did, i was repulsed.
there is something so stupid and primitive about letting
fear be a symptom of your racism. you see fear breeds an
antagonistic module in one's mind, which eventually leads to
hatred. or anger. or whatever. feelings that are dangerous
especially if mass-produced.
latent hatred is kindled by racism as well as anti-semitism.
you see racism or anti-semitism are not hatred. they are
the sparks that convert either fear or latent hatred (which
is always a form of self-doubt, just look at the germans in
the 30s). i realize it seems anti-thema to assert that
something like anti-semitism is not hatred, but the deal is
that it is misnomered. if you view these dispositions with
an ironic sense of humor and JOKE about them, only the most
naive and idiotic could ultimately pull a logical conclusion
of out right true ANTI-semitism.
why am i going to great lengths to even pull something like
this up? because i always joke about blacks, jews,
mexicans, and whatever else. but i shudder to think that
one would believe that i am truly as fearfully hateful as
this girl today.
i hate people who hate because i very simply fear them. i
am not ashamed to admit that i fear them. they can be
irrational and blinded by hatred.
my syllogism is just this
All hatred is a product of irrational fear.
Fear can be a symptom of racist ideas.
Therefore, SOME racist ideas may produce fear which in turn
exhibit hatred.
notice that a qualifier such as "can be" corroborates the
quantifier of "some" in the conclusion.
it's easy to confuse racism/hatred, but that is only when
you take the baseness of discernment as the essence of
antagonism.