muse

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Ezoic
2006-01-25 11:30:29 (UTC)

humbug

sometimes, i so want to run away from my life. sometimes, i
feel like i'm at the end of the tether, i can't take anymore
of this nonsensical world. all the irritating parts of life
make me want to bark at simply everything and anyone i meet
on the road.

i don't know what to do. i don't love anyone as much as i
want to. i am not loved by anyone as much as i want them to
do me. i'm so BORED with school. almost to the point of
saturation. i realise i feel the tender feeling only when i
meet some of the old friends i used to be close to. there is
this sense of attachment that i could not explain.

i don't like this. i don't like this feeling. i don't like
feeling so vulnerable and lonely. but i know i won't like
also to be a hypocrite. i only want to be happy. why is it
so difficult to attain happiness?

i can't wait for next year... i want to run away from this
place. i don't like it here. even if i could only go away
for half a year, i think that will suffice.

i have to drown myself in work again. i don't want to think.
mostly, i don't want to fall into depression again.


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