...Mon Couer Bat Pour Tu...
Whoa, mastur-whaaat? [Le GASP!]
So I was having one of my tell-all sessions with one of my
friends from TP, when she said:
"I've been craving to dominate someone. ...Sexually."
I choked on my coca-cola, then tried to regain my
composure. Her and I always talked about things, including
sexual stuff like masturbation, and fantasies. And more
rarely, our experiences. But this... this just kinda
"Like, what, BDSM style?" I asked.
"No. Like, put a collar around your neck and own you. Like,
telling you what to do... to yourself."
I knew she had to be taking a lot to be admitting this to
someone else, and it made me feel really privelaged to know
she trusted me that much.
"Well I mean, you want to control their sexual experiences?"
"Yeah. Like a... I dunno, sex-pet."
That got me to smile, in that "oh-you-kinky-thang" way,
with all my teeth and my nose wrinkled the slightest bit.
Yeah, THAT smile. Like I was doing something baaaad, that
made me feel deliciously naughty.
"You made me think of a bondage-style Chia pet."
"Is it weird though?"
"I don't think it. But that's me, and... you know how I am."
"Yes, but... if I had, say YOU for example, as mine- right
now I'd probably get off by telling you to touch yourself."
For the love of all that is holy, she got me to GIGGLE.
"Geezum, girl. I love you, have my babies."
She returned the giggle.
"When you grow a penis, dear."
So here I am. Planting sperm-shaped noodles in my garden...
in hopes that I can grow a penis.