mebabs

Leah's Thoughts
2005-12-07 03:04:28 (UTC)

Dear Diary...its been awhile

Sometimes...being used is not a good thing...sometimes I
think it shows us who we are and how far we are willing to
be pushed...Can I push back can I be mean and spiteful can
I hurt someone as much as I have been hurt? Sometimes I
wish I was a mean person but dear diary here we go
again...to the one who I wanted to go from the begining to
you who used me for my home..my computer...my food...making
me believe that there was something there when you hugged
me at night..makeing me have something to believe
in..making me want to have love so bad that I was willing
to make myself someone who I was not...making myself
believe that I was the one you wanted...Trying hard to
please you and coming out alone at the end...no one is out
there...no one who is willing to just be with me...I dont
know I am turning 30 and I am still single...what is love
there is no such thing..there is love within family..there
is love for my child...but the love of a man I dont think I
will ever feel. I bring out the ones who need mothers..the
ones who need a place to stay until it is time to move on.
I am the one who has a open door who will cook for you and
make sure you are feeling alright I am the one who lost
everyman I attempted to have feelings for...I am the one
who will never be in love..I think That there is no such
thing I think that my life is just a empty road...a empty
path that I have to travel. I know that there is no such
thing out there for me...for I am not a keeper I am just
someone who is willing to try and try to make you happy but
it is just not going to work...
Drea Diary....he is gone...another one bites the dust and I
am at fault for being to nice for opening my door for being
a nice person...and sometimes being a bitch is a good
thing...FOR ALL YOU BITCHES...Keep it up because men are
assholes!!!




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