darkness_takes_over

confessions
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PropellerAds
2005-11-14 21:07:54 (UTC)

Everything.

wow are things ever fucked up right now its unbelievable.
so my mom is making me go to some stupid doctors
appointment thing cause she thinks im depressed like
whatever i told her that like everyone gets upset and shes
all like not for this long you havent been happy for a
while and all you do is mope around the house and
sometimes you dont even get out of bed and blah blah blah
like whatever mom people get upset and people get tired
and i dont know its just a whole bunch of shit right now.
me and allora cant even have a five minute phone
conversation without fighting. I lost Scott, he broke up
with me because some stupid chika lied and told him sum
shit about me liking this other guy and he chose to
believe her over me, that reallie hurt. what made it even
worse i accidently told him i loved him how stupid is that
like come on. and i wasnt even thinking about it it jsut
came out. so now hes like getting with one of my friends
and im reallie trying to be supportive here and not be a
bitch but i dont know i still love him you know and im not
even sure why i cant explain it its just there and i cant
make it go away. so i started dating this chad guy...
rebound great idea right...WRONG. he fucked me over
apparently he has had a girlfriend for like a year and i
dont know i was starting to think that maybe he was a good
guy but i slept with him and then when he decided he didnt
want to see me anymore he got his girlfriend to break up
with me nice eh? i feel like i have no time for myself
lately between school and homework and trying to find a
job and a place to live and adrian i dont know i cant even
think right now i just want to get out of here just leave
only for like a week or so but i jsut need to leave. so my
moms ex boyfriend wayde asked me out on a date type thing
hes only 32 or at least it seems like a date to me he said
he reallie missed me and said we should go out for coffee
or something sometime so yeah. but you know the weird
thing is i dont even have any interest in being with
anyone other then scott right now which is so stupid i
mean i should like go out and be with people or date
someone or something you know i mean hes obviously moving
on why cant i he found someone new he has brianna so why
shouldnt i have someone? but thats jsut the thing i feel
like i have noone and i cant even talk to my friends about
it cause like i dont know i hardley even talk to any of
them as it is and they have there own problems anyways
besides richelles about the only one i havent tried
talking to about scott and stuff. allora and ashley jsut
say oh well you need to get over him like DUH you think i
dont know that if it was that easy dont you think i would
have done it you think i reallie like fuckin feeling this
way? like come on use some commen sence people anyways i
dont know this is all so fucked up so i guess thats about
it all thats left is what i reallie wish i had the courage
to say to Scott and that is: im sorrie and i didnt lie to
you. i think your a reallie great guy and i care about you
but i think you already knew that anyways my point is i
hope you are happy and whoever you end up with i want you
to be happy becuase i truely believe that that is what you
deserve, to be happy and again i guess all i can reallie
say is im sorrie.
by the way brianna is an awesome girl and they look so
good todether not to mention there personallities totally
match they are virtually perfect together aside from it
making it harder cause shes my friend but i want them both
to be happy and she likes him and it seems like he likes
her so yeah i want them both to be happy and at least i
know Scotts not gunna get fucked over, i know brianna
would never do that. i couldnt find a better girl for
Scott then brianna.
p.s: i think this is possibly the longest enrty i have
ever made.
Forever Falling: Meagan. R


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