Arienette

We are nowhere and it is now.
2005-10-11 12:03:55 (UTC)

Seekers of truth

The great dividing range.


I stayed the night at Tash's a few days this week, which was
nice. Her mother even gave her this old crib type thing so
that certainly makes things a lot easier. While there I
realised how much I missed Damien's presence so.. it's nice
to be home, I suppose. I don't think that sounds quite the
way I mean it to sound, but it will do for now.

It's just.. I miss him. And I have no reason to, because he
lives with me and we still sleep together and he still plays
songs for me and gets excited about every little thing, and
really, it's exactly the same, if not better. I don't know
what I am missing exactly. Maybe I miss being in love with
him? I think some part of me still is. I think that same
part of me feels a need to love everybody it gets close to.

I really love Tash, don't get me wrong. Every inch of her
skin is a golden dubloon waiting to be found and treasured..
I love her with and without bad analogies. I simply do not
understand my own feelings and am far too afraid to tell
Kate about them.

Seems like the only part of my life that makes sense is the
sexual one, and only then because I have finally freed
myself from constraints and it feels so great to be able to
show my love for humanity in the most basic and 'human' of
ways. I love thinking about all the bodies I have explored
and falling in love with them bit by bit, knowing that I
have helped people. I like meaningful sex, I admit it, but I
think that sex in general is meaningful if done correctly.
The three people I am currently sleeping with have affected
my life in so many ways, be it simply through sex or..
whatever. I'm babbling. :)




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