Jase

Enter My World...
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2005-10-06 14:58:26 (UTC)

"Friends"...It's a funny 'ol word, isn't it?

i'm listening to a gorgeous song. goldfrapp's "number one".
give it a listen.

right. i want sara and laura to quit uni. i know it's
selfish of me, but i'm really, really beginning to miss
them. again. i want it to go back to how it was. ya know.
spending all night at laura's. watching the sun come up,
as my eyes struggle to stay open. looking back at sara half-
dead on the couch. laura and ben just...walking. sara's
grans. yeh, it wasn't as satisfiying as laura's, but we
still had great times there. beach parties. although we
only had one. that's the night i told laura about my
sexuality. sat down, looking out at the tide, as it slowly
began to lap the shore. the sky was so cold. the moment was
so perfect. how about them infamous night at sara's, when
sal was away? saturday nights aren't the same, now. yeah, i
go out with james & katie (which is fun), but it's hardly
the same is it? no more sara falling over in the taxi
queue. no more drunken ramlings from sara. no seeing laura
going with half-wit, desperate chavs. days out. ice skating
was amazing. me and sara didn't actually ice skate, but our
group bonded over the smallest of things, which is why i
think our Foursome got on as well as we did. they are no
more. mo more "car sesh's" with laura. heh. i loved telling
her about my sexual desires & sexual going-ons. she just
listened. she showed such a keen interest. she understood
me. no more coop talk from ben and laura. yeah, it drives
me around the bend, but it's little things like that what
you look back on and think "in a twisted way, i miss
moaning about laura and ben talking about their place of
work all night". the little things are important. no more
arguments. yeh, our Foursome had them. all the time. they
brought us closer together, though. sara & laura were at it
the most. me and ben bitched about each other. me and laura
sometimes had a fight. sara and ben were at each others
throats all the time. hell, even me and sara had the
occasional spat. the occasional genuine insult often flew
out of us. us four could argue until we were blue in the
face, but nothing would change between us. we'd still be
inseparable. thanks to them three people, i finally found
out what the true defination of a "friend" is. a friend is
somebody who you can laugh with. somebody you can scream
at. somebody who you can bitch at. someone you can cry to.
someone you can open up to. someone you share life-changing
moments with. someone who you dislike. someone who you
love. somebody who can make you smile. somebody who can
make you cry. someone you listen to. someone you stand by.
someone you trust. someone you rely on.

so thank you, laura, sara and ben. thank you for giving me
2 & a half years of emotions i've never experienced. thank
you for giving me the opportunities to do something
different. thank you for opening my mind.

thank you for changing my life.

knux


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