slave jess

Journal of Joels slave
2005-08-15 18:37:04 (UTC)

sub diary 15-08-05

greetings,

i am not sure where i stand. i feel i expect too much as a
slave. i said previously how i find it difficult at times
to differentiate between vanilla & lifestyle. this past
couple days have me questioning myself once again. i tell
myself that i must accept the way my Master treats me. He
knows best. He tells me as much as He feels i need to know.
i do keep telling myself this but i am not listening and
accepting this. most weeks Master tells me when He will be
at meetings, visiting, working etc. the week end Wwe had no
contact at all. i cant accept it. i need Master's support.
just a few words of encouragement.

i dont know if this is a test of some kind. if it is then i
am failing Him. i am not slave material. i want too much.
i do not deserve my Master at all.

slavejess {MJ}




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