The First Tear

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2005-08-14 06:26:56 (UTC)

Anxiety Attack

Dear Diary

I think I'm in the midst of an anxiety attack. I'm totaly
freakin' out. I like misunderstood something someone
said...then went and told JOey and then I had to call Bryan
about it and it was one big thing! Now I'm afraid it
blowing way out of proportion. I tried to call Bryan and
head him off before registration tomorrow(or really today)
but, he was sleepin'. Oh well. I'll set my alarm for like
11 and call him tomorrow. I'm really afraid this may blow
up. I'll talk to Joey about it tomorrow but, I'm totaly
freakin' right now. I guess I shouldn't worry about it. I
just can't help it! Now Aiden is getting on my nerves! I
can't take him anymore! I can't take his screaming and his
throwing shit! I can't take it anymore. I think i"m gonna
explode! I can't breathe! I can't take anything anymore! As
I sit here and right this...I'm holding my breath. Why?
Why? Because I feel like my life is falling apart over
something so small. So small that it won't matter in a few
years. NOne of this will. So, why do I care? Why do I care
about anything...? I need to go take something. I'm gonna
get some pills to calm me down. Just for a while.