Dragongirl20989

Soul Flares
2005-07-12 02:40:10 (UTC)

Justifing Tears

My body keeps trying to cry and I can't make sense of it. I
have no reason for crying, no need for it. So why do I hurt?
Why do I feel like weeping into my pillow? I think maybe it
has to do with my dream last night. It was so weird, there
was a pool, I think and a bunch of people I guess I knew
were there only I didn't know anyone. I mean in my dream it
seemed like I did, but thinking about it now I didn't know
anyone. Only my mom was there, she didn't really look like
my mom, but that's who she was. Then there was some sort of
Ring knock off thing, and then Mom said, "See sweetie? This
is why I hate you." Just like that, like everything should
make sense now.

I know it's just a dream, but still. I mean it's my dad who
hates me, not mom. I just don't know. I guess maybe it's
because my parents have this thing where they use rock paper
sissors to decide who comes and picks me up from places.
It's the looser who comes to get me, always the looser. I
don't know, it doesn't really bug me, but that's the only
thing I can think of. That might make a dream like that show
up in my head. It was just so weird . . . and sad because
that was what I woke up to this moring. those nonexistant
words in my head. "That's why I hate you." That's why
everyone hates me . . . hate is such a strong word, such a
hurtful word when on the tounge of someone you love. On
someone who's suposed to love you.




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