slave jess

Journal of Joels slave
2005-07-06 10:18:40 (UTC)

sub diary 05-07-05

greetings,

My morning started off wonderfully. i actually woke
thinking Master was beside me sleeping soundly. i was a
little disappointed when i realised i was alone. instantly
i remembered i now had a morning ritual to do and that was
to practice pleasuring Master using my toy. as i ran my
tongue over and around its length, i thought of Masters
cock in my mouth and this toy will never be even a close
substitute for Master. i love feeling that little twitching,
the taste of the small emmissions of precum, the sounds of
Masters pleasure. oh Master i cant wait for this.

i went into work and organised for a late lunch break as i
thought Master might be home from His party for
Independance Day. i vaguely remembered Him saying something
about 9pm. my first half of the day was wonderful i was
walking on air and others noticed my happy disposition.
they knew i was planning contact with Master (or to them my
man on the net).

Master & i did manage to chat online for a short while
today. the past couple days i seem to be vague at times and
i dont know why. i am not fully focused on what Master says
to me or i seem to misinterpret what He says. it is making
me feel very sad. i feel i am failing Master because of
this. the more i tell myself to focus the more vague i
become. Master said i wasnt to blame myself for missing
Him. i dont blame myself in this way. i blame myself for
causing Him to cut His bbq with friends & family short, i
blame myself for Him speeding home, i blame myself for not
being in phone contact with Master, i blame myself for not
being at His side, i blame myself for inconveniencing
Master, i blame myself as He had told me He wished for an
early night & now i had caused Him to wait up for my return
from work. He says i am too hard on myself but maybe i need
to be so i can be an even better slave for Him. i looked
over our chat from the previous day and He had said He
would be home around 9 or so..not at 9. this is just an
example of my not fully focusing on what is said. i should
have given Master more time as i for one know how time gets
away from you when with family or friends. if i have only
logged in 1 hour later than i did then Master would have
been able to chat with me at an earlier hour and been able
to go to bed earlier as He wished to do.

We are to chat tomorrow so i will see if i stuff this
second chance up this time.

all my love,
i love You Master,
slave jess {MJ}




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