Daroon's Journey To University
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2005-07-05 09:31:54 (UTC)

Here We Go

Ok, i text Hayley and asked her to meet me when she
finishes work and she said she would, without hesitation,
so i'm hoping that's a good sign. Anyway, i don't believe
that she really wants to break up, i'm praying she really
doesn't, so i've been thinking all night about what i'm
gonna say:

"i couldn't say this yesterday becasue i couldn't believe
it was actually happening

i'm so so sorry for hurting you so badly that you'd want
to break up with me, and knowing that i have is hurting me
more than i could tell ever you

i'm sorry for everything that happened on thursday and i
know it's not an excuse, but i'm not gonna drink anymore
regardless of what happens between us

remember i said i was in bed for ages sunday night - that
was because i didn't sleep at all over the weekend because
i felt so bad about it, and i cried on the way home
because i was so worried, and i never told you because of
stupid man pride, and from now on we need to be more
honest, and talk more about how we're feeling

you means so so much to me i can't tell you how much, and
i know i mean a lot to you too, and i'll always love you,
and that without you i just feel so empty, and i know
we're meant to be together

i've never felt worse than i have since yesterday, and
when i woke up this morning, i just felt like something
was missing, that sounds a bit cliché, but it's true

love is about sacrifice and commitment, and so far you've
been doing most the sacrificing and i know that we can
come through this strong, every relationship has it's low
points, but i don't wanna through away what we have, we
can build on it and last, whatever it takes, if things
have to change, then so be it.

I was thinking last night about what's gonna happen now,
and i was thinking about the next few years, and i've
always thought of it as securing our future, so we can
afford a decent place to bring up our family, and i can't
imagine a future without you. There's nothing i can do
about the past, but there is something i can do about the
future, we can do about our future

i don't want to lose what we've got, we're too good
together for that. I am so sorry for what i've done, i
can't tell you, but i think we can come through, i want us
to come through this, and i hope you do to. I just don't
wanna throw the last two years away, i want us to have
another chance."

Or hopefully something to that effect if i can remember it
all....i don't think i've ever been more honest :$