Daroon's Journey To University
It's been like two hours since hay said she wanted to
break up and i don't think i've ever felt worse than this.
I dunno what to do with myself, i keep starting to cry, my
whole body is restless, my arms are aching, and just
knowing, just KNOWING that we're not together anymore
makes me feel sick.
It's only been two hours, but already i'm like thinking
about going to uni and stuff and just thinking, why,
before when i thought it about it, it was to get a degree
in something a love granted, but ultimately it was to get
a decent job so we could afford a decent place. Now i'm
just thinking, whats the point. I just can't imagaine
anything being fun anymore without her, nothing.
It really is like my whole world has come crashing around
me. And i didn't even fight for it, i didn't say
anything, i was just in shock when she said it and i
didn't say a thing, i just said, fair enough, cause at the
time i was thinking, right, respect what she wants, just
accept it, don't upset her mroe. Now i wish i had fought
for us, i can't just let this go, we're too good
together. I dunno what to do. I might leave it for a
day, if i can, i just want to talk to her so much, and
then on wednesday ask her if she'll meet me and try and
fight for us.
I feel soooo bad for hurting her. I feel sorry for myself
it's true, but i deserve it and i just can't believe that
i hurt her so bad that she'd want to break up with me, i
feel so terrible for it. WHY DIDN'T I FIGHT FOR US!? A
year and half, and i just let it slip away. I'd do
anything for it not to be true, i've gotta talk to her, i
have to convince her it's worth fighting for on wednesday,
i just hope she'll agree to meet me somewhere....
ARGH!!! I HATE THIS