HerbGirl

Thoughts in Green
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Ezoic
2005-06-18 23:34:50 (UTC)

Not sure what happened to him

I think that my friendship with my best friend (aka: Will)
may potentially be falling to pieces. I know this sounds
like an overdramatization but I am pretty worried that it
may happen.

It would not be the first time and it woudl certainly not
be the first time over this reason... but the scenario is
so much different this go round.

See before we stopped speaking for about a year when we
broke up and he hooked up with his first boyfriend who I
will refer to as "the idiot".... for more reason then one.
Since me and the idiot did not get a long Will chose to
alianate me from his life, that is until everything fell
apart in his relationship and he needed me yet again.

This go round it is me who has the man who he does not
like. Difference here is the idiot treated Will very poorly
and my new guy treats me like a total princess. He has not
even gotten to know him and already dislikes him based
strictly on principle.

See normally I am single and date guys who are safe bets
for me not to get seriouse with. When I do meet a guy
everyone knows he is only going to be around for a limited
time and Will gives me a million reasons why I shoud break
it off with the guy... all of this mind you within the
first month of me seeing the guy.

Well in this case he was out of town for two weeks when I
hooked up with my current guy. Over that time I had the
opportunity to really get to know him and form my own
oppinion of him. I have to say I think that he is an
awesome guy and I can see some real potential in this
realatonship. That is something that I have not been able
to say in about 7 or 8 years!

So of course Will is pissed cause he does not like the new
guy and can not sway me no matter how hard he tries. I am
making my own decisions and they are good ones, so why am I
going to listen to him!!! Now he is telling Juanathin that
this may end our friendship cause he can not handle me
taking a little time to try and find out who I am and what
makes me happy.

My question is .... how in the world did this person end up
turning in to my friend. Who is he and how did he take
over. I used to have this wonderful loving supportive
secure friend who loved me no matter what. Now he is
competative jelouse manipulative and just out right
spiteful. He does things just to try and push my buttons.
Telling me that I do not love him and am not trying hard
enouhg. He may not say those words exactly but boy are they
coming through loud and clear.

It makes me very sad to think that I may loose my best
friend .... my pookey bear for even one more minute. I
can't be the person that begs him to stay and continue to
treat me like I am his puppett and should listen to the
things that only he says.

I am a person with my own thoughts and lots and lots of
feelings but apparently that does not compute with him. He
can only see his needs right now and not mine. Well sadly I
may have to let him go and hope that someday he comes to
realize that I am here no matter what and it is not me that
is letting this friendship fall apart.... it is his self
fulfilling proficy that he will end up alone and I will
leave him and this friendship one day...

He is the one leaving not me...


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