slave jess

Journal of Joels slave
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2005-05-25 22:10:14 (UTC)

sub diary 25-05-05

just when i thought i was all alone, that special person
comes along. i tried to keep busy today and be bright and
cheerful but i couldnt hide it. i gave my staff some
reprieve by leavin work early to do the post and banking. i
went home and logged in hoping to see Master but realising
that it was too early for him. that special person was
online though. she was busy but found some quality time to
chat with me for a while. she put things in perspective
for me as she always does. i was smiling again before long
and realising i was making mountains out of molehills. i
told her a had to leave but then spent a long time before
finally leaving her. before i left i paged Master telling
Him i would be home from work early, secretly hoping He
could find some time to discuss a few worries i was having.

when i returned Master was online and Wwe were able to
chat. it wasnt a short chat either. it was wonderful. i
tried to explain to Master exactly what my worries were but
i couldnt get them across without sounding completely like
a child or a brainless idiot. it was the way i saw the
happenings in the past couple of days that just seemed to
snowball. it was growing out of all proportion and i knew
it was irrational. Master assumed i had a problem with a
female friend who was helping Him move. i did but it wasnt
the gender of the person that was the problem but the fact
that i felt as if i was getting brush aside. Master isnt
the best housekeeper and i got this idea from one of his
previous posts that He was only wanting me for a domestic
slave. Yes i know it is irrational. all my Master ever
says in here is how much He loves and adores me. but what
can i say? i am an irrational hormonal female. i felt
insecure. i was impatient about Master's time He was taking
to move (sorted this out...lack of full information).
Master has told me i will be spanked like the child i am
acting like once He is settled into His new place. should
be after end of month. i have punishment still to be served
as it is...oh well i know i bring it on myself and how is
Master ever to show His love for me if He doesnt punish me
when i need it.

good night/morning Master
love
slave jess {MJ}


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