Completely Incomplete

Letting Go Is All I've Held Onto
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2005-05-23 16:44:00 (UTC)

I was wrong. So wrong.

I had told myself, the night Kade came back, the night
that I tried to escape thsi world. I told myself that it
didnt matter he was back and that nothign had changed.
But .. it changed EVERYTHING. He was one of the ones .. if
not the only one who understood where I was comming from.
He listened. He ... what have I done. It made all the
diffrence. I was blinded by selfishness. I was blinded by
the way I thought it had to be. I was oblivious to the
rest of the world ...
I ... what have I done, thats all I can think about. How
could I ... I ...
I regret all the pain I have put everyone through.
Im sorry for everything. But Im not sorry it happened.
I realized more then anyone could have told me, just from
that ... incident.
I realized ... that it does make a diffrence, to have
someone who listens. It does make a diffrence that Kade
came back. It does make a diffrence that I have
freinds ... that are always there for me. I have made
diffrences, and Im sure ... that everyone who meets me ...
something must change. Something big or someting small.
Im not living for myself .. I understand. Kevin made me
see that as well. He made me think about all I have done.
I ... I cant ... words cant describe.
I love them all. I really hope they know that. It did make
a diffrence. Kade was always there to listen ... always
there for ... everything.
I blew it off like he didnt matter. But he does matter.
He once said that everyone who meets him is changed in
some way.
He was right, something changed. I have more of an
understanding now. Im less nieve about the rest of the
world, and I learned to love a little more. He showed me
priceless reasoning that no one else could have shown me.
Ive learned to live every day like its your last because
it damn well could be. Ive learned to hold on tight to
what you love, because tomorrow, it could be gone. Ive
learned so much about this part of the world I had always
been shelttered from.


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