whispers from a contemplAtiv soul
2005-04-25 16:48:42 (UTC)

suffering from M.W.S (men-withdrawal-symptoms)

ok so im too dependent on boiz n i kno it.but wen ur as
insecure as i am u need a boi n ur life 2 make u feel
pretti and watnot.wat do i do?ive been like this 4eva n i
hate 2 b lonely and rite now i am n i cant evn function
properly.if i c somethin romantic on t.v or ppl who go out
bein mushy gushy i lose my mind and i become this cranky
person out of no where and i get periodic times of
depression.its realli rediculous but the sad part is its
tru.i hate not havin a bf.kelvin...u messed ^ my life!lol i
dont kno wat 2 do wit myself...i realli dont.i cant liv
life like this 4 eva or ill b the type 2 neva marry cuz i
get bored wit jus 1 boi very easily and no1 wants their
pastor 2 b a pimp workin on it but its a slow
process cuz ive been like this 4eva!eva!eva!i wonda if im
always gonna b dependent on boiz 2 make me feel n-e sort of
way not jus pretty.then the next issue is findin a good
christian boi who has his head on his shouldas and thats
nearly impossible 2 find n my skool of all
basicalli stuck between a rock n a hard place.mayb i hav my
standards 2 high?but then again if they were 2 high i
wuldnt hav gone out wit the ppl did lol(if u catch my
drift).this is so crazi but i dont care who it is i jus
need a man...we'll worri bout the statistics lata,man 1st
worri lata thats jus how it goes.n i hate that "gettin 2
kno u crap"its so annoyin.u get 2 kno eachotha along the
way.if u like sum1 n they like u wat the hell shuld u wait
4?! life is 2 damn short feel me?im still n high skool,im
not lookin 4 a husband im lookin 4 a damn relationship that
will last at least a week or two or at least until i find
the next guy i like then ill dump the old 1(yea i kno im
goin bac 2 my old ways but i promised myself not 2 get
attached 2 boiz since Kelvin;so imma go bac 2 my old ways
so wat!lol).well imma go n be depressed until i get a man
which i dont c happenin.i'll jus neva measure ^ 2 a boiz
wants wen it comes 2 looks and theyll neva measure ^ 2 my
religious beliefs.o well wat can ya do?1 boi that i realli
realli realli like told me (not 2 b rude)that i remind him
of his lil sista.we jus hav that kind of relationship n i
knew we had that kinda relationship but i told him i want
it 2 b more. well c where that goes cuz he likes my good
frend so its a mess.once again ive set myelf up 4
destruction.u kno its realli tru wen they say u r ur own
enemy!culdnt get n-e mo real than [email protected] i like,likes 1
of my 2 i realli feel like crap.well w.e welcom 2
my life...the insecure, christian,
sagittarius,princess...that shuld b the title of my diary.
ta!ta! 4 now )*(smoOches)*( _*_TynA_*_