Lady Gryphon

The Bottomless Pit
2005-04-11 19:17:28 (UTC)

Maybe I Should Just Be A Girl

Today yet another person made it their business to tell me
that I should dress more like a girl. The whole tomboy
pseudo-goth thing just doesn't appeal or something. And
everytime it's the same arguement they give me. If I wear
make-up I'd be so pretty, so I'm not now, thanks. And if I
wore better fitting clothes boys will like me more. Well,
not like I want boys here, just "a" boy. I had hoped that
maybe people would just like me for me, maybe I just
needed my personality to get by, but I guess that's just
not enough. Do people really want a different version of
me so badly? I'm finally happy with me as me, but everyone
else wants a different me. I guess maybe I could get some
girly stuff and still do the whole goth thing or whatever
you want to call it. Give the people what they want for
once. But if I do that they'll still ask for more,
constantly wanting a different Liz. I never realized how
disliked this Liz was, but this year people have made it
quite obvious that if I "just did this and that", then
things would be cool. Do I really have to change me? All I
know how to be is me, and if they don't like me for me, I
can't just change me. Liz is Liz, and I thought that was
me, but do I really have to be a different Liz? Meh,
perhaps I'm just thinking too much about this, just like I
do everything else. But it's always bothered me when
people change themselves just cuz other people want them
to. But, maybe it won't be a different me, maybe it'll
just be like getting an upgrade on your computer. The new
improved version of Liz. Huzzah. Perhaps. Well, when I go
back to school shopping maybe I should actually consider
it. Maybe it actually will make me happier. Well, ta.
Lyzzie




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