Place my Pieces Together-Angie#6
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2005-04-09 23:32:43 (UTC)

Its been long....

Hey everyone...I know its been a while since I've had the
chance to write and stuff I've just been working and going
out and really havent had much time to turn on the
computer. Well to catch you up on everything.... Okay for
Spring Break 3/21 - 3/25 I worked Sunday-Tuesday and on
Wednesday I went to the beach with Diana and Nati it was
really fun. Then later on that night we went to the CP
Varsity baseball game. It was fun! I met and started to
talk to Josh. It didnt really work out I dont know! I guess
he was a little kid. Whatever! Thursday, I went to the Fair
with my family that was really fun. Friday, I went to the
beach with my mom, just the both of us. That was nice and
later on that night I went out with the crew to play pool.
Saturday, I went to the beach with the crew it was really
fun and then I forgot what I did. Sunday, I spent the day
waiting for Eddie to come back from Nica cause he spent his
Spring Break over there. OH well... thats about it. Nothing
Okay Love Life: VERY VERY CONFUSING! whats new! Okay
it goes something like this... Eddie and I started to talk
again, however, I cant seem to trust him. I dont know, I
know I've done my share of messed up things but oh man...
the more I find out about him and that fuckin hoe the more
I get disgusted by him. But then again I think about grad
nite, prom, and stuff and its like who am I going to spend
it with you know. There is no one!
Okay, Anthony, Yep.. we started to talk as friends
(only) again. The most confusing guy you'll ever find is
him. I swear! He cant make his mind up! He messes with my
feelings so much. And lately like I dont know the more i
think about my future the more I see myself with him. But
how can I think that if I'm not even with him? I love
spending time with him... like other than him wanting to
touch me all the time I love having just those times we
spend together talking about everything you know. Like the
times we spend together its fun you know. And I know I've
changed and he cant say that I havent cause I think and I
am almost positive you can tell. I miss HIM! Stupid
me..yeah I know your saying that. But the more time I spend
away from him the more I want to be with him. Like when he
texted me to call him I was like WTF and then we talked and
it got to the point that we talked everyday and would seek
around seeing each other. And then he asked me to
be "Friends with Benefits" but whats the point of that when
I know one of us is going to get attached and end up
getting hurt you know. So I didnt want that really, it was
really hard for me to say no but I had to. I couldnt let
myself get set up again you know. Whatever, one time I
skipped 5th with him and we went to our spot and kissed. Oh
Man... that kiss said it all at least to me! Gosh...it took
my breath away literally. Sometimes I cant hold myself
back...not with him. I dont know. I dont know whats his
problem. I guess his just going have to find out by himself
that his missing out. And that is it... I'm NOT GOING BACK
TO HIM! I CANT! But what does it mean that whenever we
spend time together it feels like if we're going back out
and that like I cant be with someone else without comparing
that person to him and that we both think about each other
when something comes up that brings us back memories.
Theres a lot of those. WHAT DOES THAT ALL MEAN??? Its so
stupid too... I start talking to him again and I get all
these butterflies in my stomach and start to blush for no
apparent reason. Stupid yes! I guess thats love. But NO, I
am not going to talk to him anymore. He thinks he can have
me whenever he wants and no he can't. And everytime we
start to talk he leads me to believe that there might be
something there and drops me cause some other fuckin bitch
comes into his life. But in reality I was the one that he
lost it with,I was the one that was pregnant with his baby,
me, me, me! It was all me! Whatever stupid kiD! I dont know
but I do know that his is just going to be an enemy to me
and I will be fine with that. So whatever... talk to you
guys later...I need to get ready for a crazy nite TONITE!

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