Charles Deason

My Blue Sky
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2005-04-01 23:42:24 (UTC)

To be happy, but grown up

I am... well happy. But as of right now, I'm very
lonely. I miss Astrid so much now its almost
unbearable. ::sighs:: Shes going to college soon from
now...which is great! And now shes on her way to getting a
job! I'm so proud of her. But me... I still have not
figured out how I want to live in the working world.
(although I still search for a job now)
Sometimes I feel like Astrid is better off with a guy
thats smarter bookwise and knows what he wants to do in
life for a career. But really I... feel like I deserve to
be with her more than any other guy. I know that the road
to my future is a little foggy ahead. But I wouldn't have
it any other way. I like living the way that I do and
taking things as soon as they come my way! ^^
As for Astrid... I'm sure there are hundreds of other
guys out there that she would be better off with
financially. But I'm sure there is no other guy out there
that would love her and treat her the way that I do. I've
learned more than so much being with her. And not just
that, I'm happy being with her in person... shes really
someone I'd love to hold close for as long as I live.
I'll work my hardest not just for her, but for me, and
both of us too. I'm... ::sighs:: all grown up now. Sure I'm
still the same old me! But I know now that I have someone
to love, and someone that loves me! ^_^ I'll find something
to love doing in life as a career in time. I'll continue
holding my fellowship with God close.
For my future education towards college, I have lots
of time for that when I'm ready. The first thing I want to
do is go back to see Astrid again soon. ^^ Maybe I can find
a place to stay in florida like I keep talking about. I
guess after I see her again, I'll really look into it. That
would be so dreamy to see her in person all the time, and
go places with her whenever! Well thats all for now I'll
write again soon.