daily self deceptions...
2005-03-29 21:05:49 (UTC)

A night out

So yes even though it is a Tuesday I'm going out tonight.
To a bar. Woo big deal. Going to a bar on a Tuesday evening
seems a little ridiculous to me but it's something seeing
as how I can't remember the last time I went out. And even
more so, I can't remember the last time I went out without
a man hanging on me. So it will be fun. I'm hoping. REALLY
hoping. I need this time for me. Myself. I need the time
away and to have fun. Plus free drinks never hurt anyone.
I talked to 'Dirty' while he was at work today. Only for
about an hour but it was good. Even though it is over the
internet; at least it is something. Like I said before, I
can't wait until things are "normal" and he and I can talk
like we used to. Our long, lengthy, amazing, deep
conversations. I miss them terribly.

**Just one smile and I'm wild
One smile and I'm ready to die
'Cause you're so beautiful**


This past week when I let my pressures and depression get
to me, which I haven't done in a while.. instead of
doing 'bad' things, I focused on postive. I would get so
angry I would just walk. Then I would just run. Might as
well try and get healthy while getting out my anger and
sadness right? Right.


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