chuckie

Through rose tinted glasses we're al
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2005-03-25 17:59:01 (UTC)

It's been a while

It's been ages since I last wrote in this. I've been
staying at my sisters' for a few days to help her (she's 7
months pregnant). I've discoveed who my true thinspiration
is: Kate Moss. She is gorgeous, her thighs are AMAZING,
she hs the perfect figure, she's thin and she wouldn't be
anywhere in modelling if she wasn't as fat as me. I
finally found some good sites to visit for thinspiration,
it's so good when there's no blocking of sites! They are
as you probably know; houseofsins.com, ana4wayoflife.com
and plagueangel.net. I am currently on the lookout for an
ana-m8 so if there's anyone up for it my address is
[email protected] DONT TAKE IT IF YOU'RE NOT
INTERESTED OR IF YOU'RE GONNA PREACH. DON'T BOTHER I DON'T
WANT TO HEAR IT, WHAT I DO WITH MYSELF IS MY BUSINESS
ALONE-NOT YOURS. Today I wasnt able to get out for a
proper walk so I buckled down to some good old fashioned
cleaning. That should of burnt up a few calories coz I
certainly worked up a sweat. Today so far I've consumed
about 220 cals. My new best friend has become the bottles
of water I have with me throughout the day.
It's so depressing that I cant weigh myself here. I went
to 'boots' yesterday and right now I weigh 9 stone 10
pounds, or just 109 pounds. I feel obese. I've set myself
the easy target of losing 4 pounds throughout this
fortnight. I say easy, which it will be if I retain my
control and don't do any binges. I'm not keen on making
myself sick but I'll do it so that I don't gain anything.
If I have a tight hold on myself then nothing can go wrong
and I can acheive perfection. I was in the park yesterday
and I felt so jealous of these girls, not much younger
than me, who were so much thinner. I don't do jealousy,
it's not me and the only way to get rid of this feeling is
for me to be thinner than them. I know I can do it, but
it's hard when you don't have the support of someone who
understands. I've got to go, but I'll keep you updated on
my progress.
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