sodomy_and_lust

The Dirty Slurpee
2005-03-20 18:44:41 (UTC)

bunch of random shit.

The IRS Gennie
A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the Texas
plains without water.His horse has already died of thirst.
He's crawling through the sand, certain that he has
breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden; he sees an
object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.
He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and
discovers what looks to be an old brief case. He opens it
She is wearing an IRS ID badge and a dull gray dress.
There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil
tucked behind one ear."Well, cowboy," says the
genie..."You know how I work. You have three wishes."
"I'm not falling for this." said the cowboy. "I'm not
going to trust an IRS genie." "What do you have to lose?
You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a
goner anyway!" The cowboy thinks about this for a minute,
and decides that the genie is right."OK, I wish I were in
a lush oasis with plenty of food and
drink."***POOF***The cowboy finds himself in the most
beautiful oasis he has ever seen. And he is surrounded
with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies."OK, cowpoke,
what's your second wish." "My second wish is that I was
rich beyond my wildest dreams."***POOF***The cowboy finds
himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare
gold coins and precious gems."OK, cowpuncher, you have
just one more wish. Better make it a good one!" After
thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says... "I wish
thatno matter where I go, beautiful women will want and
need me."***POOF***He turned into a tampon.The moral of
the storyIf the government offers you anything, there's
going to be a string attached.

lyrics Cibo Matto, Birthday Cake

Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is sweet!

Yes, I'm cooking for my son and his wife
It's his 30th birthday
Pour berries into my bowl
Add milk of two months ago
"It's moldy mom, isn't it?"
I don't give a flying fuck though

Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is sweet!
Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is sweet!

It's food nouveau
It's food nouveau
It's the shape of love
Beat it! Beat it up!
Beat it! Beat it up!

Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG
Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG

Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is sweet!
Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is sweet!

You were born in the 60's
We made a war with the Vietnamese
We loved LSD, we died easily
Can we just say c'est la vie?
So what! Say what! For your own sake
Do you have a headache or heartbreak?
Are you made or broken by the birthday cake?
You may be slow on the uptake
I pour pot in the birthday cake
So what! Say what! For my own sake
Watch out yo! Here I come yo!
I'm gonna change to a rattlesnake
Turn up the TV! Do you agree?
Yeah, I'm talking turkey Take it from me
I'm gonna show my love for my dove
"But it's moldy, mom, isn't it?"

Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG
Extra sugar, extra salt
Extra oil and MSG

Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is sweet!
Shut up and learn to eat!
Too bad, no bon appetit!
Shut up and learn to eat!
You know my love is very sweet!

more Cibo Matto lyrics Beef Jerky

My weight is 300 pounds
My favorite is beef jerky
I'm a vagabond, I'm a vagabond
My mom says, "You are kinky!"

Who cares? I don't care!
A horse's ass is better than yours
X4

Lay down here, baby
Just relax...honey

My baby horse is Jennifer
What a beefy hip!
She has a fine coat of fur
What shiny hair!

Who cares? I don't care!
A horse's ass is better than yours
X4

Let's eat carrots together until...
Let's eat carrots together until...

blur lyrics "Girls And Boys"

Street's like a jungle
So call the police
Following the herd
Down to Greece
On holiday
Love in the 90's
Is paranoid
On sunny beaches
Take your chances looking for

[Chorus]
GIRLS WHO ARE BOYS
WHO LIKE BOYS TO BE GIRLS
WHO DO BOYS LIKE THEY'RE GIRLS
WHO DO GIRLS LIKE THEY'RE BOYS
ALWAYS SHOULD BE SOMEONE YOU REALLY LOVE

Avoiding all work
Because there's none available
Like battery thinkers
Count your thoughts on 1 2 3 4 5 fingers
Nothing is wasted
Only reproduced
Get nasty blisters
Du bist sehr schon
But we haven't been introduced




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