FreshStartingChick

My New Journey
2005-03-20 12:20:27 (UTC)

Uncontrollable Urge

Even though I spent a nice few days with spaceguy, being
taking out and having a good time and the fact that he
tellse me how much he loves me, I have spent the last few
days thinking only of freshguy and trying to get in connect
with him.

Oh my God, what is wrong with me? Freshguy has told me he
doesn't
want me and never did find me suitable for a commented ltr
with him. Now that he has found some other women he doesn't
even want me for the other reason. Still I hang on by
leaving messages on his answering machine that he ignores
or calls back to say that he couldn't answer it because he
was spending the night over some other woman's house.

I just want to stop the thought process where he is
concerned because it is getting me no where but hurt and
miserable.

When I call or reach out to freshguy and he ignores me, I
feel rejected, sad, depraved, foolish, ugly, desperate,
self-demeaning and hopeless. Dear God please help in
getting me off this rollercoaster of emotions or addiction
for freshguy soon so that I can get on with my life.

I am please to report that I really watched my what I ate
yesterday and will do the same today.




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