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2005-03-18 19:34:49 (UTC)

reasons and main problems

reasons to start fresh,

1)i screw up way 2 much! lol an i over react cos i dont
deal wiv things well.

im guna learn to deal with things beter an try so much
harder not 2 screw up. i guna b careful an think in the
mornin bout wot i aint guna du!

2)i cant think strate. i can neva think things thru an
that reli anoys me!

im guna stop to think bout things, im guna learn 2 not b
side tracked. if i need to think sumfin thru eitha du it
in some quite alone or find sum1 i can talk to.

3)im to paraniod and needy! i cant belive people wen they
sey they care and i always feel like a burden. i always
need tellin im right b4 i think i am an need sum1s
reasurance 2 much.

im guna learn to be more indipendant, learn to like myself
and value mtself. im guna stop letting my thourts taking

4)ive got to much to live for. i dont normaly think like
this but i du! i no i sed today that id b beter off dead
but thats cos i lost the thourght i had that was keepin my
head up! iv found it agen tho an im sorry erin that u ad 2
try a luk afta me (thats me bein needy! lol).

im guna keep hold to the thourght that i am needed by some

5)i worry alot!

im guna try and think strate insted of worry, some things
will worry me still but if i can i'll beat them! ill make
it beter if i can an if not i'll du as much as posible to
help the situation.

6)i havent got motivation or a very long atention span! i
neva stick 2 stuf which is y this will b so hard! lol

im guna reli try from now on and read this wen i feel like
im slippin back into old habits! im guna b in control!

so thats them reli

i got a few main problems atm,

1)my mum, she mite not be ok, shes had this cheast xray an
it aint gud. we r waitin 4 results now an if thers stil
sumfin ther it cud b cancer, but then agen it mite b
sumfin else!

2)course work an exams! lol i reli need to du cw this
weekend an i wil! as part of this new start i will! the
exams i will revise 4 this time 2! this is eaiser sed than
dun cos i dont av a very long atention span! lol

3)the r a few family things i dont like to talk bout but
get me down.

4)i get reli upset alot about things i fink r rong but
sumtimes rnt or i jus dont hav any evidance that they r!
its stupid paranoa!

5)i screwed up reli badly recently and i dont want to feel
like that agen!

6)i dont wana b depresed! an i dont want ppl 2 think "oh
shes depresed agen, thats gettin old" any more!

rite! so i got this 2 read wen i need 2! lol this will
work!! u'll c!! lol