NotSoSadSadie

The Laughter Inside My Mind
2005-03-18 17:06:19 (UTC)

Is It REALLY Possible to foresee the Future?

Today was like any other ordinary day,started by watching
the 6am news to see if they were going to cancel school(i
prayed they didn't)got lucky or so i thought!!
As i was watching the news i got a weird thought in my head
that my youngest son's school had called me and told me he
never made it to school--i shook it off because he hadn't
even left for school yet...
As the time got closer to sending him off to the bus,i made
a mental note of EVERYTHING he was wearing..off he
went.."have a great day" yep is the only reaction i get
from him..(What goes through young minds nowadays--too cool
now to say ok mom thanx i will?)
I continue to watch tv and clean up the house a tad bit
(it's friday so i feel lazy),my best friend calls on the
house phone,then i see my cellphone blinking(turn it off at
night so my drunk friends don't bother me)
It was my son's school.Did he stay home sick from school
they ask..He left for the bus i stated i watched him go,she
then tells me she'll recheck and call me back..
My best friend is still on the other phone telling me to
calm down,i get dizzy and deafness surrounds me;all i can
think..what happened?
The principal calls back to let me know my baby didn't show
up at school,i drop both phones and i feel the ground
reaching up to me,my head is spinning as i scream NO NO,he
has to be there..i watched him walk to the bus stop two
houses away..I feel my heart about to come out of my chest
and the pit of my stomach is clenching,i cant breathe,where
is he,what must he be thinking..it's so cold..WHAT IF
SOMEBODY TOOK MY BABY? OH LORD PROTECT HIM AND LET HIM FIND
HIS WAY..
As the principal tells me we can all go out looking,in
walks my son..he decided he didn't want to take the bus,so
he walked to school,i wanted to vomit at that very moment,i
was happy and angry..is that wrong of me..to want to hug
him to let him know how much i love him and that i was
worried;yet on the other hand i wanted to grab him and
scream"what in the world were you thinking?"
We have alot of talking to do when he gets home..
Thank Goodness i'm able to keep my head above water..i
don't want to drown..and someone should have told me that
being a parent DOESN'T come with instructions...

Til Next Time,
Sadie


Thoughts,
Frustration,
Ideas,

My Mind I wonder,is it working right,
So many messages coming to my head at night.

This story is going to make me big,I think to myself.

Leave me,let me be,I will do it in my own way,
You have no right,you have no say.

This story's thoughts,are my emotions,
I won't give up,this is my devotion.

This story's life,is through my gentle touch,
And it's howling words mean to me ever so much.




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