some about my mind
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2005-03-17 11:23:47 (UTC)

i am really fed up...

I am a total failure ,why you all treat me like this ?Where
on earth am i wrong ?Though i have sent numerous e-
mails ,to my surprise ,no one response to me.
I ,how to epress myself ,feel terrible ill.Oh
shit ,shit,what a dirty word ,obviously,i know i should not
say that kind of words,byt i just want to let my supression
out,only to find a way to free my heart and soul.
Sometimes people say that the world is completely
satisfying because they usually could get what they want to
possess,while there are still quite a lot of people who are
badly in need of some nessecities ,on contrary, what can
they get finally?I am afriad even God can do nothoing help
the Queen.
From the literature point of view,many a realistic
writer have made great contributions to reveal or expose
the dark side of society to all members who are aware of
their social status .After all, the sun also rises every
day,and who said that everyday the sun is anew?
I do'nt understand whether or not should we believe that
the world is full of good humanity and ...
With no doubt ,happiness and sadness go hand in hand .They
fear no one but fright evey one,Oh my goodness,who can tell
right from wrong ?Who still stick to some kind of faith ?
Like Horthorn said "the original sin is a birth mark that
accompanys man from the cradle to the grave",i see, it must
be experiensed tests in the course of time,yes it is
life ,In Jack Lodon's Love of Life,he tells us a storyabout
two men ,and i clearly remember :This is life ,only life
hurts.To some extent, London is a natrurelist ,so in diredt
sense we know his convictoin that man has nothing to do in
the face of Nature but submite .Though we cannot deny that
he is too onesided to be accepted by some greenhorns ,how
should reject it uttimately?Fate bears so heavy a burden
that it is always overbearing,from history ,quite a number
of romantic poets adopted a escaping means to live the rest
of their lives,William Wordsworth is an eample,as far i
Till now i am a little calm physicaly but who knows what
is going on in my mind ?It seems that confusion has
captured me ,oh no who is my rescuer ?Help!Help!
Is this abyss ?I must give myself a shower to clean my
hraet and soul ,unfortunately, the more i write the heavier
my heart is,what a theory!