lukeryu

Mental Screamings
2005-03-10 07:57:56 (UTC)

Rose Garden National Park

Yesterday was so horrible. I got my grade in Circuits and
it sucked. And by sucked, I dont mean sucked a little. I
mean it sucked like a french porn star (or a floormate of
mine from last year) sucks a penis. I'll need to talk to
him to see if there is anything I can do to improve it.
Then there was D&D, which went to 2am. I'm sorry, but I
just got off tour and have a shitload to make up. 2 am is
not acceptable. Vic stopped by midway through the game and
we talked about my last post here, except he, knowing
exactly who everyone is who I was talking about, chose to
discuss it with me using the same initials that I used. It
was kinda funny, talking to him in a sort of code. It was a
good thing that he used those instead of the actual names,
because one of the guys who I was playing with was one of
the guys who I dont care about. I dont think he had a clue.
She is currently watching "Mean Girls" with the two guys
who I dont care about. I wished her luck in coming home in
one piece. I couldnt get a read off of her what her
feelings were about the situation. She knew that they like
her, but she was also asking Rachel if she would join them
(she wanted some female backup). I dont know what that
means. Not that I should care. But I do.

I think the remedial affection training is working. In the
past 24 hours, I've had four favorable encounters with
females. First was D&D last night. For some reason, one of
the girls was kinda flirting with me. I dunno why. I think
it was probably more to piss off the ex who is also playing
the game rather than a great crush on me, but hey, I'm not
complaining. Second was today, I saw a friend that I hadnt
seen for a couple of weeks, so I sat down next to her and
started talking. We talked and she was saying how hard life
had been for the past few weeks, and I sat there, listened,
put my arm around her and let her lay on my shoulder and let
it all out, occasionally interjecting a quip or two to cheer
her up slightly. Granted, I did get help from others, but I
think she feels somewhat better now. Third and fourth one
were at choir tonight. Third was a nice conversation with
Rachel. I need more conversation in my life. Fourth was a
dance in the church with EC. It was like 5 seconds, but we
had fun and talked afterwards and the whole nine yards.
Now, I dont think I would have done some of this stuff not 6
months ago. I know I wouldnt have put my arms around a
girl, and here I've had mine around 3 of them in the past 24
hours. I'm making progress, I think.

We have new furniture. Some stuff happened that I shall not
tell because it is not mine to tell, but the result is that
we now have the largest bean bag chair I have ever seen
(except there are no beans in it) and it is sitting in our
room waiting to be used. Donavon and his girlfriend were
making liberal use of it today. I have got to get me one of
these for next year. It is so comfortable. It probably
costs more than I want to pay for it, though. It is SOOO
cool, though.

Two missions for the rest of the year: reduce
procrastination and stop caring about what my readers think.
I am going to reduce procrastination by requiring myself to
do a hour of homework minimum every day (yes, I have been
known to go days without doing it and then pulling all
nighters to finish it). And the second one has nothing to
do with disliking you or anything, its just I occasionally
find myself wanting to write about something and then
stopping, thinking that people wont like it or are bored of
it. It is my blog, so I should write what I want in it.

Anyone want to help me learn how to flirt like a girl for my
D&D character?

G'night




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