passnpalcechica1

Maggie Mae
2005-03-03 04:12:57 (UTC)

AHHH I FORGOT.

Ugh, such a long day. I got up at 6:40, went to
breakfast, had physics from eight to ten, dug out my car
and moved it, had lunch at noon, studied for organic and
consequently MISSED the missions service, had dinner at 5,
work from six to eight, more studying from eight to 9:30,
then back to the room, just to do MORE work; a project for
Physics and a reading/journal assighnment for Philo and
ethics.
And now it is eleven at night. I am exhausted. I felt
really bad about missing the missions service, I STILL
feel really bad about it. I mean...I was even in the same
building...(the chapel is below the library) but I
completely forgot. I think I just forgot it was
wednesday. I was studying organic, so I was probably in
one of those zones where there is no time, or date...it's
all just kind of an endless reality...at least that's what
it feels like. To make it worse, I remembered it, all the
way up to yesterday afternoon, and I reminded my friend
meg at last twice (she was supposed to sponsor me) and SHE
remembered....but I didn't. I felt so bad...she must have
felt awkward being there without me...especially when my
name was called and I wasn't there. sigh. I guess it's
normal to forget something when you're so busy...but I
really do feel bad about it. I went to campus ministry to
appologize, and Holly said it was OK, and she gave me a
hug and a cross (they were handed out at the service) but
I still felt bad for forgetting. She even said there were
some other people who weren't there...but I don't know if
she said that just to make me feel better. She was a
little distracted because she was getting ready to go home.
Anyways, I tried to appologize to Meg, but heidi seems
to think Meg will be mad at me for a long while. I hope
not...I certainly didn't do it on purpose, and I am very
gratefull that she agreed to be my sponsor, and that she
remembered to go...she even got out of work early for it.
Oh how I wish I had told someone where I would be...maybe
then someone would have come and found me. You know
what's even worse, I left the library at 4:20 to go see a
professor, who as it turned out had already left...I SOO
could have gone to the service...even if it was late, I
doubt it was over...but I STILL didn't remember. I didn't
remember it untill dinner when my friend Erin was talking
about this guy she likes (who happens to be in my SBWF
group) and how his parents were up for "that spring break
thing today" I had been feeling rather good about the day
up untill that moment...when I suddenly realized, with
great Horror, that I had forgotten, and not only that...my
friend meg had been there without me. I hate forgetting
things. I am normally so dependable and prompt. My MOM
is the one who forgets things all the time.
But anyways. It's all water under the bridge now. I
can't go back in time and make it to the meeting, and I'm
still going to NY, so it is pointless to beat myself up
about it. Ugh, I'm soo exhausted. It's time for bed. :-/
Take care and God bless.
~Mae




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