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2005-03-02 14:07:52 (UTC)

Lost in the Crowd

can i say how much i just don't care? It's an interesting
feeling. the lexapro - a PRESCRIBED mind-altering drug...
i feel little - well, not really. i feel - great highs
and great lows - but i don't care that i feel.
i...i...i...i..i... ...maybe I like it this way. at
least i bleed to know i'm alive. what is alive? is it a
measure of what you think or feel? does that mean that if
you don't care you're dead? is alive touching or feeling -
because i'll bet you dead people can touch and feel,
too. is it being burned to a crispiness on the know like when pancake mix or something gets
stuck to the inside of an oven and turns all black and
hard? what is life? what is death? is there really a
line between the two? does anyone else speak my
language? i want to know. i have to know. love hate
born dead orange apathy I AM NOT PERFECT i want to be a
shadow dancer to run around completely aware and alive but
the world oblivious so nobody sees who i truly am what is
what i truly am anyway? am i here? am i there? am i
good? am i evil? am i an angel in america?

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