CrimsonTears

Hollow Years
2005-02-27 00:48:08 (UTC)

Hmmmm today..

Well today was okay, went to the benches then the coffe
house with the normal people (carl played the guitar
again :)) then went to the cinema with Denise Andru Anna
and Helen watched Hide and Seek. It was a good night and a
good film.It scared me and made me jump, it also made me
cry when the cat got drowned :( *wah wah*.
Anyway in all it was a good day...i feel a bit down now tho
i spose.I was meant to be going to Simon's tomorrow well
today actually seen as its past twelve but i really doubt i
will now. i was meant to ring him but it went onto the
answer machine and he is set to away on his Msn. i was
bothered before but i really doubted i would end up going
anyway he doesn't really care about me much anymore so i
dunno why he would want to spend a day with me . a few
months ago he would of :( now its all changed and i cant do
nothing about that i know i cant but oh well :(. Beccy is
upset tonight sean is making her it's horrible hearing
about my friends being upset i want to make them happy
again but sometimes i just dont know what to say to make
them better really :(. I wonder what it would be like if i
did go simons tomorrow and what he would be like with me i
mean ive not seen him in ages well not properly anyway the
last time i saw him properly he was my b/f and i slept his
house :( the best night of my life....i wonder why he
doesnt care much anymore i mean he doesnt even really want
to see me as a friend and thats all i need really just to
know he's there because i care about him so much and to
know that he was there for me would make me feel so much
better i want him to be happy but i also dont want to loose
him it would hurt to much if i did but i spose one day i
will i doubt he will put up with me being there moaning
still about the past for much longer.
I know i should get over him and living in the past and the
memorys of him is not the answer but i cant help it. he
means so much to me just to hug him makes me feel better
inside :( i think even though i dont believe in it at this
age i actually did.. love him.


Song: Yellowcard - one year, six months
Mood: okish




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